rant book

i

brains.

i feel so stupid. i am not that smart. i'm not that great in school. when my friends say things like this i usually tell them that book smarts don't matter. because they sort of don't, depending on what you want for your future. but you should never let a test or a school determine how smart you are. i always say that to others, but why do i feel like that doesn't apply to myself.

i want to be smarter. i want to have good grades and i do try. but i just can't. i can't pass no matter how hard i try. nothing works no method of studying or ways to get the correct answer. nothing works. i just hate myself for it. i can't pass math and i'm failing english because i can't remember a few definitions to sat words. and because i don't do homework which is all on me. i also feel like i'm going to start failing spanish..but it's the end of the year! what if they hold me back or what if i have to do summer school and disappoint my mom..

i want to do better and be better. school just isn't a place for me..

:(