Only Cry Silent Tears

Figuring Things Out

I know I have been gone and really I cant give you all any excuse that will make my absence anymore acceptable so I'm just going to drop this update her and hopefully you all forgive me. I really love this story so much that I promise to finish it but .. life man. I'll be back sooner rather than later to update. Enjoy

-CV

___________________

Monica

"Sure." He said nonchalantly. My eyes grew wide. A big smile grew on my face, teeth showing and all. I wanted to jump for joy but I knew better than to get too happy. I listened to the way he said it and he didn't seem like he was sleepy and would forget it later. He was aware and said it clear as day. I turned around to walk back to my room. But he started to mumble something I didn't hear him so I turned around.

"What did you say?" I asked.

"Oh I said it was going to cost you. You want to go and be a fast hanging out with boys and all that then I'm going to treat you like one. You can go to the dance but when you come back home I'm going to make you a woman."

I knew better than to respond to him so I just walked to my room making sure to lock the door every way I could. I laid in bed only praying to god like I did most nights. Many people in my situation would have lost faith in god but it was honestly the only thing keeping me sane. I laid in my bed remembering my parents and the life Ava and I lived before their death. We were a happy family. I wasn't bullied as much and I got outstanding grades, I didn't have many worries in the world. I miss them so much; I didn't even notice tears streaming down my face as I drifted off to sleep.

I woke up the next morning wondering if last night was a dream but when I got up to get Ava up I noticed the lingerie Rodney made me wear and I knew it was real. I couldn't believe he said what he did to me. I didn't even know what it meant to be made a woman but I knew I didn't want to find out. I dropped Ava off at school. Not wanting to give off that I something was really bothering me. I try to protect Ava from as much as I could. I got on the bus and made my way to school. Thinking. I want to go to the dance for Christian because I know he want to go......but I'm terrified of the outcome that it will produce. I walked to his locker first he was standing with Tray and Shawn.

"Hey baby!" He smiled kissing me. I smiled against his lips then we both turned to Tray and Shawn.

"oh, oh! Let's give them some alone time" Shawn laughed.

"That's right, New love needs privacy." Tray said then they walked away making kissing noises making us laugh, something I desperately needed.

"They need help." I laughed.

"Truer words have never been spoken." He said shaking his head. He gazed into my eyes and pulled me closer to him. "So I was thinking, about the dance and we should," He started. My mind immediately went back to last night and the things Rodney said and I tensed up. I didn't want Christian to notice so I cut him off.

"Christian 'm not sure if I can go. I don't have anyone to watch Ava, and I really don't have a dress to wear." I said giving him the half-truth.

"Babe, Destiny can watch her, she would love to anyway. Don't worry about the dress, I can take care of that and plus coach wants the basketball team there and my grades are back up so I can play and I want my love to be on my arm." He said barely taking a breath in between. Him taking me to the dance really meant something to him and I couldn't take that away from him. I felt bad. I want Christian to be happy but, it'll bring a start to so much more pain and suffering on my behalf. I don't know what to do. even though I'm going to have a good time. I'll have to think of what I have to do when I get back.