Authors Note: This is my most popular and famous poem I have ever written. I have performed this many times at poetry slam competitions and performed at many different venues throughout Alaska and Washington. If I get enough votes/comments, I will upload a video of me performing this piece. Vote, Comment, Fan and be sure to tell me what you think!!
Breaking the Chains
Your essence
Your memory
Your soul
has grabbed ahold of me with an iron grip
forcing me to my knees
in mercy
making me beg for forgiveness
atonement
for what I've done
You dictate what I do
or say
what I do or say to my body
a vessel you had no problem
lavishing up
now its wasting away
in a package of
low self esteem and scars
vomit and tears
hate and guilt
it was your insurance
your house deed for my soul
but last I checked
you didn't own me or control me
two years has been two years too long
I was submissive
caught in a web where I yearned
yearned for the love we had
yearned for what was
and will never be again
high on the memories
chasing my first
my first love
my first fast
my first purge
my first cut
like a lovesick anorexic
never good enough
you planted seeds of
perfection
that took root when you left
you planted seeds of
hatred
that took root when you left
you planted seeds of
self doubt
that took root when you left
and when you left a whole damn garden bloomed
in the place where you had been
a place now being sowed and tilled
by distorted memories
until I cry in agony
beating myself to make
away!
because the pain of being possessed
is too much to bare
crying and
pulling out my hair
hair that i let go unkept
when you left
i realized you were too
scared
to go alone
so you took me with you
and i let you drag me to hell
because that's what is was
I went through hell after you left
a hell that was worse
than a thousand painful deaths
and sadly your death began to feel more like mine
horrible and unforgiving
only I stayed alive
but your reigns tightened on me
choking me into guilty servitude
until i could protest no longer
it was "yes sir, no sir
your wish is my command sir"
a puppet with strings held by your hands
hands that felt like they would beat me
if I tried to let go
and it's funny, you know
I always thought I was the one that needed to let go
Well you know what?
you need to let go of ME!
Rest in peace
YOU ARE READING
Perfectly Flawed
PoetryA collection of poems dealing with depression, eating disorders, hate, anger, suicide, hope, love, change, and new life. Enjoy :) xx
