Dakota

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen

Noah's P.O.V

I dug my nails into my teeth. Gnashing it away out of nerve's, such a horrid habit I had gained overtime.

I stood outside Dakota's front door with my feet rooted to the ground, yet in any moment now I felt like belting it. But I dared didn't, instead I knocked on the door with three hard and firm raps. The echoed beats no louder than the wrenching sound of my weary chest pounding heavily in the sweating heat.

This is it. This is the right-

The second the door peeped open slightly I felt rolls of sweat perspire from my hands.

And I ran for it.

*

Three days later ...

The swirls of the beach water danced with the wind ever so softly, yet so furiously with their crashing waves and harsh collision with the pebbles and rocks. My feet deepened further into the sand, hiding my shy toes away from sight.

A rustling sound disrupted my deep thought. I acknowledged that she sat down (not-so) quietly besides me. I didn't turn to stare at her, nor did I greet her. But I knew she was there, but not why she was here. Her familiar soft breaths and captivating daisy scent allured me further into the abyss of regret and loneliness I was so trying to forget.

"How are you?" She asked.

"I've been better. You?"

"Crap."

It took me all my strength not to burst out in anger. Surely she hasn't been dealing with worser situations than I have. She didn't have to deal with the rejection, nor the hurt that I had to face.

I didn't reply.

"How's life?" she asked, obviously trying to start a 'normal' conversation. Our conversations were always awkwardly rude and hysterical ... not normal. I didn't like this change in the slightest.

"Your dad?" She suggested, tucking her toes beneath the sand too.

"If you must know, that bastard is getting married again."

"Oh ... third or second time?"

"More like seventh or sixth time."

"Woah ... that's a shit load."

I chuckled lightly. Truth be told, it must have been the first time I've laughed in days. This was what I wanted. These were the days I awaited, the days filled with Dakota's humorous presence. She-

"Wait did you just say 'shit'?" I asked, completely bewildered at the thought. This time I actually looked at her, and the sudden sight of her and her beautiful flaws caused by breath to hitch.

The way she furrowed her messy eyebrows and crinkled her eyes at the realization that she had just in fact swore for most improbably the first time ever. She chuckled deeply, covering her mouth with her long-sleeved jumper as she did so, in an effort to hide her glorious laugh.

"I guess I did." she laughed, covering her mouth as she did so before, again.

It took every ounce of strength in me not to hold her hand because [1] she was sitting so close - so very close - to me and I needed her touch just to know she was even here ... with me. [2] I loved her laugh, [3] I loved the crinkles in her eyes as she laughed, and the dimples on her cheek, but she was covering it all away from sight. [4] And honestly, I just wanted to hold her hand.

"I blame you and your foul language Noah." She grinned, shoving me slightly in a somewhat playful manner.

(Un)intentionally, I shoved her back in a not-so playful manner, causing her to literally eat the sand as she fell face first on the sediment ground.

I laughed. She frowned. I still laughed. Then she began laughing with me.

"I miss this." She sighed happily.

"I miss us." I agreed.

"Noah you twat face. I really do miss you." And then she began to cry in earful sobs, so I caressed her in my arms. Soothing soft circles on her back with my hand, in hopeful attempts of comfort, I watched as she cried on my shoulder, so helplessly, and in such a delicate state.

Was I doing it right? Shit. Am I even supposed to be hugging a crying person?

Fucking bullocks with shit on top. I'm doing it all wro-

"Noah, why can't you be a jerk like the others?" She swallowed the tears as she spoke.

"Do you want me to be?" I asked.

"No."

There was a long period of soft crying until she had finally relaxed and began to speak quietly.

"Noah, I miss us too. Like a hell of a lot. It's been hell without you; seriously, I miss your shitty face, and your sarcastic commentary, and your juvenile nature, and ... just everything! For gods sake, what even happened to us?"

I didn't reply. Because honestly, I feared that we had drifted apart during these past couple days, and I never wanted to experience it ever again. This time I wouldn't allow myself to drift from her, I wouldn't allow myself to lose Dakota.