Author's Note: I attempted to make Jack and Helena's sad ending a little bit happy. Hopefully you will not hate me for ending the book this way. The stories and lyrics are posted at the end. They have some incredible meanings behind them. They are common church songs from the 20's and 30's.
After reading this, go read "One Look My Way" and you will see Jack's happy ending!
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September 4th: The last six days have been a blur. We buried Helena and Charles together yesterday. I am so full of sorrows, I am numb. I feel like I’m in a terrible nightmare, and she will wake me from it any moment. I keep singing the three hymns we sang those last few days. I don’t finish them. I cry instead.
Folks are being very sweet, and trying to keep me busy. They bring food, and Jay doesn’t want to leave my side. He is sleeping here instead of the cottage.
I am missing half of myself. It’s buried in the family cemetery.
I’m going out to the field where God saved me, and camping for a few days. I need to not be in our bed right now. I cannot even go in the room where Charles was born. I keep the doors closed.
Christmas: This is unbearable. A year ago, the whole world was before us and life couldn’t have been better. I pray so many nights for Him just to take me home. Living is not living without her. I go through the motions, smile, etc., but no one is fooled by it. Jay and his family left a week after the funeral.
He is here for Christmas. How the Army is letting him take so much time, I don’t know, but I am thankful for it. Mom and Pop, and the McBrides all came over for Dinner. They brought too much food. It is a more subdued holiday than in the past. The shadow of Helena’s death eclipses any joy we might have otherwise expressed.
Annie and Johnny are my biggest helpers, as are Tuck and Ten and their families. They managed the harvest and all that went into it this year. The hot summer was not so good for the crops.
April 14th: Though I don’t have time to write much, I will place this short note in. Madeleine sent me her half of the letters from when she was corresponding with Helena. I can now read the whole communication. It’s difficult to know now that she had some hardships, because of the outcome. Maybe if I had known, we would’ve been able to change it. Maybe not. God has a plan, but I am not privy to its purposes.
June 15th: I visited Jay and Maddie in Kansas for a week. The baby is learning to walk already. She is five months older than Charles, so I guess she is developing on schedule. She’s beautiful, and has some of our familial features.
August 15th: We would’ve had our anniversary today. I am engulfed in depression. I think I will go visit the cemetery and sing a few of our songs to my wife and my son.
August 29th: I thought I could write something, but nothing will come. She’s been gone a year. They’ve been gone a year.
November 26th: Helena’s birthday. The day I proposed to her two years ago. Just wanted to jot it down. Not exactly sure why I didn’t last year. Life is slowly getting more bearable, though there are days I cry a little, and others nonstop. This year’s crop was not as good as last year’s, and that one was not a good crop. Thanksgiving was good. All the family came, except Jay, who could not escape this year. I miss having my brother around. He and Maddie are expecting again in the summertime. Though I thought I would be sad, I am not. I am so thrilled they are expanding their little family. Rachel is a doll, and running. I will send a letter to them.
January 8th: Christmas was blessed. This year was not as hard as last year and I seem to be less depressed than before. I still only have been out to their graves a couple of times since August. It’s too hard.
April 4th: Easter Sunday. Today was a beautiful day of celebration and promise.
July 20th: Today I met Tuck and Ten’s baby sister, Alabama. She is a school teacher, and is visiting with them on her summer travels. Everyone came over for after-church dinner. We had a fun time telling stories and joking around. She is very sweet and we exchanged addresses so that we will be able to correspond. I think I will at least answer her letters. I am not looking to get married again. I don’t know if I could handle any more pain than I’ve already been through. But, she is a sweet, and beautiful, woman.
All in all, God is good. I think He will make all things beautiful in His time. Helena’s faith is a constant reminder to trust God and I vowed not to let myself become bitter towards Him after she went to Glory. Helena’s song pierces my dreams, and I wake up with a tear and a smile. “This is my story, this is my song. Praising my Savior all the day long.”
http://tinatruelove.hubpages.com/hub/It-Is-Well-With-My-Soul-The-History-Behind-The-Hymn
http://www.gospelpiano.com/articles/hymn-stories-4-all-the-way-my-saviour-leads-me.htm
http://library.timelesstruths.org/music/Blessed_Assurance/
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A Love That Time Cannot Erase (#2 - Eternal Love Series)
RomanceUpon returning home from college, Jackson (Jack) Marshall meets a friend from his childhood: Helena McBride. Only, she's all grown up, and as beautiful as she is sweet. He is instantly infatuated with her. First he must gain her father's permission...
