i feel like every single thing i do isn't right. i want to be happy, i want my friends to be happy too. i want my parents to be proud of me for once. i don't want to cry anymore. i want to be strong.
when i was helping my friends these past weeks, i feel like i wasn't doing anything. i felt like i was making the situation worst. why..am i so stupid? i don't deserve my friends to be honest. they are great people who make people smile, it makes me happy, but on the other hand, i'm just here. i got called a hoe, a slut, and many more awful things.
my self esteem is broken. if it was a thermometer or something, it would break because that's how bad it is. when i used to like this guy, he called me trash and wouldn't sit next to me. my parents would make fun of me and also my friends. i didn't understand. i just, want to be confident in myself. i don't want to cry. i look ugly when i cry.
i look in the mirror sometimes, and i feel like i look like a hideous monster who needs to climb into a hole, and just never come out. this is about 90% of my feelings about myself. i have a big forehead, ugly eyes, flat nose, and square face. i feel ugly. ugh.
please, don't be like me. you are beautiful with all of your insecurities. i just, can't accept myself.
-angelica
