#3 :: Royal By Name, Loyal By Blood Pt. 3

18.

To Kill Or Not To Kill?

EVA.

It had been three months since the incident with me, Joziah and his bitch. To say she surprised me was an understatement. She was nothing like Sabrina. Even though I hated her because she had fucked my man; she didn't tolerate any bullshit. And she had been cheated on so I knew she could relate. She punched him in his face on her way out which had me wanting to high five a sister.

What got to me was the fact he was upset about her finishing things with him. He walked out on me as if I was the one in the wrong! I had had enough. I packed my stuff and was all ready to go...I was waiting for him to come back so he could see that he was about to lose the best thing ever to happen to him; the problem was he never came back. Three months had gone by and still no Joziah. The tracker on his car always took me to one of his gyms but he wasn't there sometimes; I was going insane.

Where was he? Was he with her?

Maybe Nayah forgave him. I got mad and trashed the house. I never tidied up and every time I thought about them both, I would get take away. I had even taken up drinking.

One day I was just staring out the window wondering how my life had come to this when I saw his car coming in to the drive. I thought I would be happy to see him but I wasn't, I was even more pissed that he thought he could come back. I took my gun from under the bed and went downstairs waiting for him to come from his man cave.

"Where. The. Fuck. Have. You. Been?" I said through gritted teeth whilst pointing the gun at him.

He looked at me like I was crazy.

I thought the gun would have scared him. But it didn't. He didn't take me serious. He didn't respect me either. He was happy to tell me that he was going to sleep around because he could so if I wanted to be miserable I would be doing that on my own.

After being such a bastard he left. I don't know why but I couldn't believe it. He really didn't care. It was then I decided to stop caring too. I was fighting for someone who didn't want to be fought for nor would they fight for me. For our relationship. Fourteen years. Gone. Just like that. I wouldn't let him get away with this. He would pay.

I had to act like everything was okay but I had a plan. A plan that would crush Joziah and make him hurt just like I have been. I called an express cleaning company to come and tidy up the house. I then decided to soak in a long hot bath, wash my hair and paint my hands and feet. I then ordered food and took out a bottle of wine and smiled.

My plan would break Joziah and I couldn't wait for it to happen. I wasn't expecting him to come back that evening so when he did I had to pretend I could stomach him. Had to pretend all was well. I know he wasn't expecting to come and see the place completely clean and me not looking like the crazy woman he had left earlier.

"I'm glad you came back. I don't wanna fight witchu anymore." I said.

Knowing this was what he would want to hear.

"Good. Because I came here to tell you the same thing." I got up and went over to him.

I dropped to my knees ready to execute my plan. To make him think I'm back to being dumb Eva.

"Eva...no. Eva GET UP!" He stops me.

He's literally trying to get me to stand back up. I frown.

"What is wrong? You my husband. Lemme please my husband." I insist.

Then he said it. The words I dreaded ever hearing. The words that made my plan go right out the window.

"Nayah is pregnant."

"Dafuq you just say?" I asked him standing up in his face.

I know I didn't hear him right. I couldn't have.

"She called me today. Said she needed to meet. I went and met with her and she comes waddling in. She's seven months pregnant. She also isn't sure if it's mine..." I noticed he paused. He had the look of hurt in his eyes. I listened as he continued. "...She slept with her baby daddy around the same time...so there's a chance it could be his."

I laughed because he looked crushed to know someone stepped out on his cheating ass. This was all too much for me.

"Seven months? Around the time you brought her back here?"

"That was the only time we had sex."

I smirked. If it was his, he was proof of the saying it only takes one time.

"And if it's yours?"

"I'ma take care of mine." Was his response.

My temples grew I wanted to smoke him.

"And if it ain't?"

"Then it ain't. This was the first time I had seen and spoken to Nayah since the three of us were here. Look. I'm telling you this because she thought you should know and she's right. I'm sorry because I know you can't have kids but if it's mine I'ma be involved in his life".

"His?"

It hit me. The boy he always wanted.

"There's more..."

"What more could there possibly be Joziah?"

"She stated that if I am the father and I choose to step up and play my role as a father, you ain't allowed around our child."

"Oh is that right?" I smirked.

"Eva, I'm not gon fight witchu or her about this. I'm not hiding anything either. Everything is out in the open. You got two choices. One. Start yo own life without me. I can give you more money than you know what to do with. This house, the mini house all yours. If you wanna sell it then you can. Or option two. Stay, be miserable as you love to call it. Be envious, be heartbroken, and on top of all of that be aware that when I leave the house I may be going to see and spend time with my son if it's mine."

"Joziah...Get. Out." Was my response.

"Eva..."

"I know you heard me. Get out. Get the fuck out!!" He sighed and left.

As soon as he left I burst into tears. I knew for a long time that my relationship was over. I knew for a long time that I lost my Rico...my Joziah...but I had sacrificed so much, I didn't want to accept that this was it. This was why I never left or never gave up on this sham of a relationship. I should be Joziah's world. He never seemed to realize that. It would be so easy to walk away, to start again. But let's be real, unless I'm getting with someone who wants no children or shoots blanks I'm gon go through the same thing.

I honestly believe Joziah cheated because he knew I couldn't have children so we would never have a proper family that we both wanted. I have always wanted to have children. I was heartbroken when they told me in order for me to have survived it meant I would be unable to have children. I would have preferred to have died. Now here I am about to watch my husband possibly have a child with someone else.

I wanted to kill her. But from the conversation we had and the way she popped off at Joziah I knew she wasn't like Sabrina; I knew she was serious and meant business. I couldn't live like this though...even if it wasn't his son, it just meant he would go and fuck about again.

As I walked around the house all that was going around in my head was to kill or not to kill...someone had to die...the question was who?

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