Well i decided that I was done with feeling so horribly, so dead, so empty, so sad, so miserable etc. so instead of attempting I decided to go to one of my last few resources, my psychologist, I took a big risk and told her everything that has been going on with me for months. To be honest I was really worried about what she was going to say and do. As soon as I told her she immediately told me that she was proud of me for being honest with her and that she will do what ever she can to help me. We decided on getting me on a stronger, faster working antidepressant and starting me at a moderately high dosage. I go and see her again in 2 weeks along with checking in with her weekly. Shes one of the few adults in my life that i feel actually cares for me. I hope with all of me that this works because this is one of my last resources that can help me get better and not shut down again. My friends keep reassuring me that it will work, I soooo hope they are right.
