Broken Angel

Chapter 4

I woke up on my floor, my head was throbbing, my eyes burned and my body ached. I slowly stretched my muscles before getting up. I went into the bathroom and splashed some water on my face to help wake myself up.  For the last few days, I have felt like I was in a dream, as if nothing was real. I looked at my reflection. My hair was matted; my eyes were puffy and formed dark black circles under them. My face looked sunken in, to sum it all up and give you better idea of how I looked, I would have to say Lindsey Lohan looked better than I in her doped up mug shots did.

My stomach let out a cry for food, as the hunger pain engulfed my stomach I tried to remember the last time I had ate. I decided I better try to eat something when I came up short for a answer, pretty sad I can’t remember when I put food in my stomach. I slowly made my way down stairs to the kitchen.  As I got closer, I could smell food cooking, whatever it was it smelt well and my pace quickened.

“Rochelle.” Hannah screeched and ran over to me.

Everyone’s head spun so fast in my direction I thought for sure they would have whiplash.

“Good morning.” Stacy said a bit shocked. Cannot say that I blame her, I have not come out of my room.

“Good morning.” I mumbled back.

After Hannah released me, I went to take a seat at the table as Stacy placed some food on a late for me.

“Thank you.”

“You are welcome; it’s nice to see you out of your room.”

It actually felt kind of nice to be out of my room, the only thing I did in there was think and when I thought I cried, when I cried I hurt. I was sick of crying and sick of hurting. “It's nice to be out of my room.”

“Does this mean you will be with us more often?” Hannah asked hopefully.

“Maybe.” I said as I started to eat my food.

For a little while the room fell silent, all you could hear was the light click and clank of metal forks hitting the glass plates. Even though the room was quiet, I did not feel so bad. I still had this aching pain in my chest but it did not seem to be as terrible as it did when I was alone.

“So, what are your plans for today?” Bruce asked

I shrugged my shoulders. “Don’t really have any.”

“We could go to the mall.” Amanda offered.

I do not know if I am ready for that type of step yet. I just made myself able to remove myself from my room. “I don’t know about that Amanda, thanks for the offer though.”

“That’s ok, I understand, we can just sit outside for a while and talk if you want.”

I don’t know if I am ready for that yet but, it is worth a shot.” Sure but I need to shower first.”

Amanda nodded her head. I finished my food and placed my plate in the sink. As I was about to head upstairs, Stacy stopped me. “Rochelle honey, I know you are still trying to understand all of this….” She trailed off think of how she was going to state her next sentence. “But, we do need to have the funeral.”

I froze in my spot, as her words replayed in my head ‘funeral’. Having a funeral meant this was real, I did not want to have to admit it but I was only hurting myself more if I did not.  I slowly walked over to Stacy, “um, I don’t know how to plan an f-f…...” I took a deep breath before I finished the sentence. “Funeral, can you help me?” I asked fighting back the urge to cry.

“Oh, Rochelle, of course I will.” Stacy pulled me into a hug, and to my surprise, I hugged her back. In that brief moment I, felt loved again.

As I headed for the stairs, I overheard Hannah ask, “Will Rochelle ever be happy like she used to be? I miss her.” Her voice was desperate. Just the tone made my heart sink, I knew I need to cope better but how do I do that?