Beautiful When You Don't Try (Camren)

Chapter 41

A/N: Almost the whole chapter is Camren. There is a very short scene of Adrianne/Kim though. And for those of you who said their scene in the last chapter seemed a little out of character or forced...It was kinda suppose to feel that way. It led to this one.

A warning for this chapter. There is a rather angsty moment. Or really, a recollection of a past angsty moment.

Hope you enjoy.

~/~/~/~

"Are you coming to bed?" Camila looked over to the raven haired woman laying in bed and nodded her head.

"I was thinking you would already be asleep by the time I got here." The brunette confessed as she shut the bedroom door and set down her bag. With Camila's shows running as late as they did, Lauren had provided her with a spare key to her apartment so she could let herself in and not worry about waking clara up.

"I was waiting for you. I'm a cuddler, remember? I need my cuddle buddy if I am to fall asleep." Camila's heart melted at the innocence Lauren put into her voice and at the romantic gesture that the woman willingly stayed up till one in the morning to wait for Camila to get there, knowing she would have to wake up for work in six hours. She did that nearly every night and Camila loved her more for it.

"And what do you do if you don't have a cuddle buddy?" The brunette asked as she walked over to the dresser and pulled out the night clothes she was keeping there and then climbed into bed.

Lauren already had the covers pulled back for her. Camila leaned down and kissed her lover and lingered in the closeness before laying down and allowing Lauren to rest her head on her chest. "I snuggle up with a pillow. That's why I sleep with so many, but now that I have you...they end up on the floor."

"You're cute. Now go to sleep. You have an early morning and I know you're crabby when you don't get enough sleep." Camila loved these nights. It just felt like the perfect ending to a long day, surrounded in complete comfort. She couldn't wait until they had their own place and wouldn't have to try and fit these nights in. They would just happen automatically.

She laid awake for over an hour, staring at the ceiling, running her hand through Lauren's soft hair, and listening to her lover's breathing as she slept. She wasn't thinking about anything in particular while she laid there, but just soaked in the moment. She had never experienced anything like this in her previous relationships, complete complacency. Thinking back, Camila couldn't ever think of a time when she had felt uncomfortable around the raven haired woman. There was always that sense of security and protection. Even when she was in doubt of herself, Lauren was right there with words of reassurance and the fear quickly faded.

She thought back to the first day they met in Lauren's studio. She had been so nervous but Lauren knew exactly everything to do to calm those worries, from the smile to the space between them when the spoke, to the words she said. Lauren had known about this, or hoped that this would come to be. But Camila had never imagined in a million years that she would be laying here with Lauren Jauregui in her arms. She also knew that was going to be a question she was going to be asked.

Lauren had it easy. She had always had theses feelings, but Camila...she was going to have to explain this seemingly instant and random attraction to speculative fans, yet she didn't even know how it happened. Lauren romanced her with her words and made her feel things she never had before, seduced by her passion, but what led her to claim the woman and have sex with the woman? What was it that had her laying in bed at that very moment with the woman?

Camila sighed heavily, then feared for a split second that she had woken Lauren up, but the raven haired snuggled closer to her. This was an undefinable need. Why hadn't she needed the raven haired before? Was it because Lauren had been so different then? Or was it that Camila was just so focused on herself that she didn't really take the time to get to know her? Granted, Camila did offer a friendship that was rejected and Lauren was openly hostile towards her, but what about the latter part of Junior year and Senior year when the animosity subsided. Why didn't she take notice then?