Notes

12

For the first time in what seemed like years, I woke up properly. Not drifting in between the realm of consciousness and a mixture of medicines following through my blood like an unwelcome lullaby. I tried to sit up, but my stomach felt as if it had been stabbed. My ears adjusted to the subtle noise circulating the room; small chatter that sounded like it was coming from a distance, machines singing their monotone tunes in each room, breathing coming from my room. I tried to recognise who was in the room, but a cloud of confusion seemed to surround my brain.

"Hello?"

"Hey sweetheart." The familiar voice makes my heart pump a little slower, grounding me back into the reality of the current situation.

"How long have I been out?" My mind attempted to flicker back to the passed couple of days, but only got flashbacks of memories I didn't understand. My brain was trying to remember something, yet I was just a vessel in which the memory lived, and must have died. I couldn't remember, the only thing popping into my mind was the sweet smell of flowers and the feel of soft fur against my face. Where had I felt that before?

"You've been drifting in and out for about three days now. You haven't really spoken much, the medicine they've been giving you kept you awake, but not fully here."

Mum's voice spoke with a hint of relief, which of course, I could understand. I didn't realise I had been out for three whole days; my mind couldn't recall anything. Her chair collided with the ground with force as she etched her way over to my bed, holding my hand. Her touch was comforting, a relaxing wave crashing over my body. I squeezed her hand as tight as I could.

"Where's Kyra?"

"She had to go home. Her dad called, and from what I could make out he sounded upset. She really wanted to stay, but you know how her dad is ever since..."

"It's okay, I understand. When did she go home?"

"Only this morning, it's 2pm now. She hadn't left before that."

"She didn't go home?"

Mum laughed. "The nurses tried to make her go home, but you know Kyra. She wouldn't listen to them. At one point they almost got security to force her out, but she finally said she would go home. I got a message twenty minutes after she left the ward saying she was hiding in the bathroom, and to tell her when it was safe to come back."

I could only imagine the nurses trying to force Kyra away, attempting to reason with a girl they stood no chance against. It made me smile more than she would ever know.

Underneath my bed I heard a loud exhale, a noise I only noticed after the room became silent. Mum must have seen the flinch of my skin.

"It's alright. It's just Salem."

I exhaled softly. Mum tapped my hand with her fingers softly, as if playing a small rhythmic beat on my skin. My own fingers missed the feeling of a piano beneath them, my fingerprints wanting to imprint on each notes surface once more. I had to learn Side by Side for Iris, so I could show her the next time I saw it. Butterflies danced in my stomach at the thought of her laugh, how happy it would make me feel to know she was happy. The lady deserved so much, and I was determined to learn that song so we could play it together.

I wondered if she knew where I was, if Professor Kellum knew where I was. I didn't talk to many people anymore, but I wondered if those that I did speak to thought about my absence. Without me, was their something missing in people's lives, or was I an interest that people got over once they found a new hobby? Was my music a featured song in the lives of those I played for, or was it a backing track that people skipped once the notes rang out? That was my worst fear, to play, just for my songs to be carried into the wind as if they were meant to be pushed away. For once people forgot my songs, I would have no way to draw the world that stood before me.