Next day
Jacob
"What the fuck you mean you don't have the shoe? This is a fucking shoe store for fucks sake." I yelled loudly at the employee.
"Jake, dude, calm down. We'll just try another store." Elijah said calmly.
"No, it's the fucking principle. How does a fucking shoe store not have shoes? This is fucking ridiculous." I growled as I walked out of the store.
"I'm sorry for his behavior." I heard Elijah apologize.
"Elijah!" I shouted at him.
"Hey, you may be able to yell at them but don't try that shit with me, Jacob." He said sternly.
"Whatever." I mumbled as I went to walk out the mall.
"Wait up." He shouted trying to catch up with me.
When he caught up with me, he put his hand on my shoulder.
"You okay, Jacob? You been acting differently." Elijah questioned.
"I'd rather talk about it at your place." I said.
"Alright. Get in" He said as we reached his car.
I got in on the passenger side as he got in on the driver's side.
" I dedicate, I dedicate. I dedicate, I dedicate." Played softly from the radio.
It got me thinking.
I'm just a 22 year old model. Of course, I got pretty face but what do I have besides that? Nothing, nothing at all. When he left me for him, he took my soul with him and, now, I'm nothing. Nothing but a shell of a man.
"Aye, Jake. We here, man." Elijah said slightly shaking me.
"Alright." I said as I got out the car and walked behind the house.
I then took a seat on one of the patio chairs.
"So tell me what's up." Elijah said as he took a seat next to me.
"Its Chres. Just like it always is." I mumbled.
"I just don't get. Why does he keep running to him? I mean, I take care of them, making sure Royal and him have clothes and shoes and what does Jacquees do? Nothing, absolutely nothing, and guess what? Chres goes running to him everytime. I'm tired of it. I just don't know what to do." I ranted bitterly.
"Have you and Chres just talked, no sex, no Royal, no phones, just y'all two sharing conversation?" Elijah asked sincerely.
"No." I muttered.
"That's part of the problem. No communication. If you don't have communication, there's no trust. Y'all need to talk, as soon as possible." He reasoned.
"Is he in the house?" I asked.
"I don't know. Let's find out." Elijah said getting up and walking towards the backdoor.
Once he opened it, we went to the kitchen, where Mike was in the kitchen holding Maya.
"Hey, baby. Hi, princess" Elijah greeted, kissing Micheal's cheek before also leaning down to kiss Maya's cheek.
"Hey, Lijah. Hey, Jacob." Micheal greeted back, kissing Elijah on the cheek.
"Hey, Mike. Is Chres here?" I asked.
"Yeah, he just went upstairs." Mike answered.
I turned and proceeded upstairs. Once I got in front of Chres's door, I knocked softly before opening the door.
"Hey." I said softly.
"Hey. Why you in my room?" He replied from his spot on his bed.
"Don't start, Chres. I just came to talk." I said as I sat at the edge of the bed.
"Then talk." He said rudely.
"What's with the attitude, Chres?" I said impatiently.
"What attitude, Jacob?" Chres said smartly.
"Look, Chres, I didn't come to do this with you. I just want to talk." I sighed.
"Then talk." He repeated before laying down on his bed.
I took a long breath before I began to talk again.
"Why him? Why him, when you have me, Chresanto? Why?" I questioned.
"Jacob, what are talking about?" He asked, sitting up.
"Chres, you know damn well what I'm talking about. Why you keep fucking him, when you got me? Why you keep running to him, when I got everything you need? I don't understand. I mean, I'm more of a man than he is." I shouted angrily.
"You think your better than he is? Please, tell me how." Chres laughed.
"Who was there when you gave birth? Definitely not him. Who gives you money every month to take care of you and Royal? Not him. I sit here day and night, working hard to provide for you and a child that isn't even mine. Now, tell me what man pays child support for a child that isn't his. A real one. Now, tell me what man abandons his boyfriend while he's pregnant. A fake one but if that's your ideal vision of a man, then maybe I shouldn't even be here." I stated before going to walk out the door.
"Jacob, wait." Chres said grabbing my wrist.
"What, Chres?" I asked calmly.
"I love you." He said wrapping his arms around my neck.
"Save the bullshit, Chres." I said shoving him and walking towards the door.
"I'm serious, Jacob." He said wrapping his arms around me again, pecking my lips lightly.
" I love you too, Chres." I said softly as he began to lay soft kisses down my neck.
"Chres." I said as he began to get on his knees.
"Yes, Jacob." Chres said innocently, looking at me through lidded eyes with his mouth inches away from my bulge.
"I didn't come here for this." I stated, pushing his head away from my erection.
"I know but I like it better this way." He replied, undoing my belt and pants.
"No, Chres. Get-" I began but I was cut off by Chres putting my member into his warm mouth.
"Shit." I grunted as he began to deep throat me.
I held his head as my eyes started to roll back.
I started thinking again.
Why do I always do this to myself? I love him. I can't help it. Everytime I come over here he makes me feel boundless but everytime I try to have something real with him, it blows up in my face. I just want him to love me like he loves him. Is that is too hard to ask?
