TRIGGER WARNING: self harm and suicide. viewer discretion is advised.
I open the door to the car and step out, looking up to the house I once thought as a dream home. I look to Ethan. He looks just as nervous as me. "You sure you're ready?" he asks.
"Yeah. I need to know." I say, and I feel myself shaking slightly. He takes my hand. Better.
We walk up to the door and knock, dropping hands. The door opens. Tyler.
"Hey, Ethan." He says. "Hi, Alex."
"Hey, Tyler. Is Mark home?" I ask. He nods.
"Come on in." We walk in and I see Mark sitting on the couch. He's looking at a picture in my sketch pad, but I can't make it out from here. At the sound of footsteps, he looks up. I feel my breath quicken as we make eye contact. He suddenly stands, and runs up to us, tackling Ethan in a hug.
I stand awkwardly, expecting to be accused again of... well, what I was accused of before. When Ethan and Mark pull apart, he looks to me.
"Alex," he says and hugs me too. I'm taken by surprise and stiffen. after a few seconds, though, I hug back, ignoring the tears flowing;. We pull apart. he looks at me, tears in his eyes.
"I'm sorry, guys," he says, talking to both of us, but looking only at me. "I shouldn't have assumed."
"Thank you for apologizing." I say, my voice constricted from trying not to cry. He smiles.
"Now, let's talk business. You need to explain this." He holds up the sketch pad. I stiffen at the picture. I drew it after my first attempt at suicide. It's a picture of my left arm, with a long gash across it, oozing blood. Just looking at it makes me feel sick to my stomach.
"Is that your arm?" Tyler asks, his voice right with assumed horror. I nod, gripping the spot where that exact scar is, refusing to look away from my hideous drawing.
"Yeah..." I squeak out before finally looking away, staring at my shoes with shame.
"Alex," I look to Ethan hesitantly. His teal eyes are full of hurt and sadness, causing a pang of guilt in my heart. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I'm sorry, I didn't know how," I say, voice quivering. "And I felt I didn't need to unless..."
"She had the urge again," Mark says quietly, completing my thought. I look back to him slowly.
His eyes, though always the same color, can change with a flash of emotion. When angry they're hard, cold, full of fire. Excited, they're filled with hope and joy. Now, they're filled with understanding, like a warm hug from Mother, who I haven't seen in three years.
"Yes," I say quietly, "And you kept that urge from me. You make my life whole. I feel safe with you," I say softly, looking away from Mark and into Ethan's eyes. Those brown eyes are magical, but those blue ones are home.
(A/N)
So. That happened. Yeah, so this gonna get a bit sad, and then happy! Yay!!
Out from summer, and my B-Day is in twelve days!! YE!!!
Song: Believer, Imagine Dragons
~ Salem
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I Want to Help You (CrankGamePlays x Reader)
Fanfiction** Completed, Sequel/One-Shots is highly unlikely but we will see** TRIGGER WARNING: mentions of suicide, self harm, themes of eating disorders and a chapter(s) with themes similar to domestic violence Alexandra Heids has been through a lot; She's...
