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My whole life Jughead and I have known each other. At first we weren't really friends but as we got older we also got closer. We never were as close as he was with Archie, but close enough to share almost every secret and feeling with the other. However, as we got older I also started to notice that the way I feel and act around him has changed. My heart began to beat faster whenever I was with him. I had this indescribable tingling in my stomach. I couldn't control my mouth anymore, it constantly was formed in a big smile. But the worst change was my confidence when he was near me. I began to stutter and I was a nervous mess. I was confused and tried to push the unknown feelings away, not really caring what's the meaning behind them. But one day when I realized that they got worse I decided to ask my mom, finally wanting to know what that means. She just had a big smile on her face and told me that love feels that way. I remember how I shrugged her off, telling her that she's wrong and that we're just friends. Since then she always smirked when she sees Jughead and me together. A few months later I've come to realize that she was indeed right about my feelings for him. Since then I tried my best to be my usual self around him.
I couldn't stop myself from thinking that he doesn't feel the same, that he deserved better anyway. After a while I've decided to ask Veronica to help me to get over him. She wasn't a big help, though. All she did help me with is telling him, and when I say she helped me I mean she forced me in her own loving but yet determining way. "Believe me, he's totally head over heels for you," she assured me with a smile. After she convinced me, we, mostly she, planned my confession to him. To say that Veronica's excited would be an understatement. And that's how I ended up here in the student's lounge. My heart beats like crazy and my breath is probably the quickest it could be. "Jug, erm, could we... Could we talk for a minute? Alone," I ask, trying to avoid eye contact with him. "Sure," the raven-haired boy says, standing up and following me to an quieter spot. I quickly glance to Veronica, who gives me a thumb up. "Is everything alright, Y/N?" His voice sounding concerned. My eyes are fixed to the ground, too nervous to look in his. I take a deep breath and open my mouth when Betty enters the room, telling us that she needs to tell us something important. "Can we talk later?" the boy in front of me asks me. "Yeah." To be honest I'm a bit hurt that Betty was a higher priority to him than I am. Sighing I walk up to my friends, sitting down next to Veronica. Betty begins to tell us her oh so important story but I don't listen to it, too busy to sink into my own thoughts. Should I really confess to Jughead? If I don't, Ronnie's going to rip off my head, I think, biting my lip. I get pulled out of my thoughts when I feel someone grabbing my hand and squeezing it lightly. Confused I look at her, wanting to know the reason for her action. She just looks straight forward. My eyes follow hers. I freeze at scene in front of me. Jughead's arm is wrapped around Betty, obviously trying to comfort her. I let my eyes wander between them, noticing the loving look they exchange. A sick feeling starts to fill my stomach. The others must have notice the odd behavior, too, since all of them have confused look on her face. My mouth slightly opens. All I can think of is the way he holds her. As realization dawns, my chest tightens. I can't stay here, I think as I stand up quickly. "Where are you going?" All eyes are on me now, making me feel more uncomfortable. "I, erm, I forgot that I have to do... stuff," I stutter, collecting my stuff and exit the room as fast as possible. I try my hardest to hold back the tears as my vision gets blurry. Knowing that my parents aren't home I decide it's the best to just go home. The walk home don't last long since I basically ran the whole time. The first thing I do when I get home is going in my room and sit down on my bed. Not strong enough to hold the tears back anymore, I let them flow freely down my cheeks. How could I be this blind? Of course he would fall for her. Stupid me. Who would pick a daisy in a field of roses, right? I don't know how long I cry for but after some time the tears stop. All that's left is that hurt but yet empty feeling. With dry eyes I take my phone out of my pocket and unlock it. Veronica sent me a message, asking me if I'm still up for Pop's. I type a simple 'yes' even though I know that Jug and Betty will be there. Sighing I stand up, making my way to the bathroom since I have to re-do my makeup. When I look in the mirror my breathe stops for a moment. I look how I feel. I not only have red and puffy eyes, I look exhausted in general. "That's gonna be a lot of work," I murmur to myself. – Sighing I enter Pop's, automatically walking to our usual booth. Betty is the first one that notices me. "Hi," she smiles at me. My eyes wander to Jughead, who's sitting right next to her. "Hey," I reply, putting on a fake smile. "Is everything alright? You stormed off quite fast earlier," Betty says, concern lacing in her voice. "Yeah, I just had this really important thing to do," I lie with a small smile, while sitting down next to Veronica. I sense how she sends me a worried look. I turn to her and mouth 'I'm fine, really'. She narrows her eyes, not believing me. I roll my eyes at her and turning back to Betty and Jughead. "Anyways, can you believe-" And that's when I space out. My eyes are fixed on the two person in front of me. Betty leans on Jughead and laughs about something. He looks at her and smiles lightly. I always knew he doesn't feel the same but seeing how he happy is with her really hurts. Although looking at them hurts me, I can't seem to look away. She's so much prettier than I am. I understand why he fell for her. I wouldn't choose me, either. I feel tears filling my eyes and my throat closing. It's getting harder to breathe. The world's spinning around me. I'm trying to focus on my breathing but it seems impossible. I quickly stand up, mumbling a quiet 'I gotta go use the bathroom' and leaving the table. As soon as I enter the bathroom I slide down the wall and let the tears flow for the second time today. The room is empty, all you can hear is my sobbing. I'm too focused on crying that I don't notice how someone opens the door and sit down next to me. Arms are wrapped around me and soft words are whispered in my ear. I look up, seeing a sad smiling Veronica. My mouth opens but before I can say anything Veronica mumbles, "I know". We sit in silence for a few minutes until I decide to speak up. "Why does it have to hurt so much, Ronnie?" I sob, laying my head on her shoulder. "I don't know," she mutters. Her hand starts to trace patterns on my back, trying to comfort me. "I'm sorry, Y/N/N," Veronica says quietly. "For what?" She sighs, tightens her grip around me. "I told you he feels the same. I got your hopes up" Guilt filling her voice. "It's not your fault, Ronnie. You can't make him love me" a sad smile on my face. "He doesn't deserve you, anyway," she tries to cheer me up. "What do you think if we order some pizza and then watch a movie at my place?" the girl suggests with a smile on her face. "Just you and me, right?" She nods and wipes away my tears. "Of course," she replies, standing up. I follow her suit and stand up. A small smile forms on my face when I realize how lucky I am to have a friend like her. Although I still feel heartbroken I know that I will get through this with her by my side.
