ᵃᶠᵗᵉʳᵐᵃᵗʰ ▸ 𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐀 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐅𝐅 ✓

two.

AFTERMATH.
002. ❛ thanks. ❜

So, my first therapeutic meeting with my psychiatrist resulted in me yelling at her for claiming that she knew what my emotional state was. She's not a bad person, and she's doing what she was suppose to do. But if you make me talk about my feelings, then I'll probably react in spontaneous and sarcastic way. Therapy had a negative connotation that only crazy people go, or unstable people go for their problems. The only reason I'm attending was because of the evaluation that I had done, physical was okay but mental wasn't to their standards.

Or it's a simple way of saying that I had similar issues to Bruce; some anger issues that I couldn't suppress. As an agent, I have to maintain my feelings under my skin and not let them show. Even before, I was wired that way. To never let my emotion shows.

I don't like talking about personal things, or more importantly my feelings because I'm guarded up in the defense. Maybe that's why I made a good SHIELD agent, at least that's what everyone would say. One that I had a really good resting bitch face, and that I had a really good poker face. And against all speculations, I didn't learn it from Natasha. Surprisingly, I had some skill to pull that off without her.

Back to the main point, she suggested if I didn't want to speak it about then I should write about it. She actually handed me a bunch of exercises that I should do for each journal entry. That was the driving point of why I walked out of our session, but if therapy was what my orders were, then therapy it had to be.

The first exercise listed that I should list all the reasons that I'm thankful. Well that's bloody underwhelming, call it thanksgiving instead. Let's get this show on the road, shall we?

What I'm thankful for:

• For The Avengers for giving me the opportunity to be one of them.
• The fact that no major threat is attacking the world.
• That SHIELD has open its doors to many more enhances, inhumans, and just people who aren't human.
• That I have amazing friends that care for me.
• For therapy that I've been sent to by Tony Stark.
• For this exercise.
• For the fact that it took me 5 bullet points to get sarcastic.

Looks like I'm thankful for a lot of things.

Wow.