Beautiful Nightmare

Day 11

(Nyssa)

After finding out the death of my mother, the pain didn’t hurt that bad. I knew that knock would come I just didn’t think it be that soon. Tay hasn’t talked to me since I told her three days ago and I don’t blame or force her to speak, we all have our own way to grieve.

Our Aunt Stephanie came from Virginia, she wasn’t at all compassionate about our mothers passing, and she sat us down and told us “The Truth”.

“Nyssa, Tay, I know this is hard for you two, but your mother was… well I won’t beat around the bush we all knew she was the weakest link. She was with my brother and she definitely was when she popped you out” she said pointing her freshly done French manicured finger at me.

“I already have the funeral laid out, it’ll be this Thursday because I have a life and I can’t stay out in this slum for too long”

Tay's eyes moved to me in shock, “Auntie the funeral can’t be Thursday” she whimpered speaking for the first time in days her eyes still on me.

“And why is that?” asked my aunt folding her arms.

“That’s Nyssa’s birthday” said Tay who was now hugging me tight.

“Oh-Well I’m sorry Nyssa… I didn’t know it was your birthday. I never felt a sense to remember it, anyway I can’t move the date and the insurance company wouldn’t allow it either. You’ll just have to do.” said my Aunt who walked to pick up her briefcase by the door.

I just nodded my head because this felt like nothing different between my aunt and I, thanks to her December ninth will forever be a reminder of how my mother’s thirty eight years of life were cut short.

I clutched my stomach now being a full month due covering the baby bump that was now visible, most people just think its extra weight I’m gaining from emotional eating.

My Aunt left shortly after hugging and kissing Tay's head, she’s always preferred Tay over me, but that stopped bothering me a long time ago. My aunt Stephanie is my father’s sister, my aunt along with the rest of my father’s family blamed my mother for my father’s death. A few nights after my father’s death I overheard my Aunt and grandmother screaming at my mother saying, “That bitch drove my brother to his death! She’s ungrateful and manipulative and that bitch really thinks Nyssa is my bothers child! She’s not we all know you’re a gold digger you knew he could get you out of the slums you populated from! I told him! You killed my brother!”

When my mother was twenty and a junior in college she got pregnant by my father, my father’s family always have denied my claiming I was just a scheme for my mother to get rich. They never saw any of my father’s features in me, yet my father loved my mother. He took her in and they were in love, my father loved me and I know if he were still here none of this would be going on… but he’s not.

I walked Tay to Aria's house, she’s been staying there for the past few days until we get through the funeral. Tay needs stability through this rough patch in our life and she gets that from Aria and her parents and they even offered me to come stay with them too, but I just need my own space and they understood that.

After dropping off Tay I walked back home laying on my bed holding my stomach just thinking about everything that has happen and about how I want so much to change. I got up remembering that I hadn’t taken my prenatal vitamins yet walking to the kitchen only to see my aunt there holding the bottle in her hand.

“How’d you get in here” I asked moving for the bottle.

“Don’t worry about that and you’re pregnant?” She asked moving the bottle out of my reach.