Mortal Infinity

1st Trail

Duas' POV

It had been three months since Scythe became so distant again. I thought it was because she wanted to help Stahl and Kira to be together for the second time. She really loved those love birds. Somehow, I felt her heart broke when she heard the news of them breaking up for good. She was silently blaming herself about it. Stahl never bothered to show his face again. (I guessed only to Scythe and me, Kira said that he could still talk with him!) He also felt the Infinity Residence; saying he hated to be a burden to us. He said that he would be still attending the same school but he wished not to interact with us anymore.(I wouldn't believe him.) Scythe was really trying to cover the hurt in her. I just learned that Stahl's family entrusted their son to her. I tried my best to cheer her up but I failed in many ways.  She wouldn't shout at my foolishness yet I could still hear her upset whispers.

Everytime I would go berserk for no particular reason, she would blame herself. She never cried in front of me. She said it was against her pride but I knew she couldn't bear me any longer. I knew she said there was no turning back. She turned me into something I was not. Every night, I would think if Scythe really loved me back or all those time, I was just a nuisance for her. What if she just made me her lover so I would shut up? What if she just came to my life to ruin everything? What if she didn't love me at all?

I refused to believe those things, but something inside me kept on changing from time to time. I never told my father about it because I knew he would just accuse Scythe for my abnormalities. Gradually, I knew I was becoming a failure.

I returned to my normal classes. The building for students in Special Curriculum was already repaired. Repaired was not exactly the right word, more likely- the word newfangled. I had no idea why was Kira transferred in Special Curriculum but I felt relieved having him around. One month ago, Scythe was called back to the main family, she didn't even say goodbye. In fact, she left without mentioning it to me. She had left me hanging again. She had disappeared from my range again.  People from her place said she was too busy to talk to me. Once in a while, I would bug them non-stop until to the point where I could receive some harsh replies. I endured all of their theories about me and our fading love. If I couldn't handle effortless harms, how could I even protect my love? I waited for any sign but all I had received was a voicemail saying "I'm sorry, I can't tell you anything.". Her any voice was serious and cold. It didn't have any concerns.

That night, I didn't cry. I remembered the real me. I saw my old self- the most perfect guy. What had happened to me? I almost lost everything because of her. I totally forgot who I was. I knew it all along she couldn't trust me. If she coudn't do that, what was the point of even letting me take her hand? It was useless. It was useless for me to love her. She would never love me back. It was so simple yet it never occured to me.

 It was such a waste of time loving her.

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I went to the school library. I opened my laptop then surfed in the internet. Looking at some news, I saw Scythe in one article. As always, it was about their company. Nothing to take note at all. But there was one thing that caught my attention, it was her geniune smile. I looked at it again; making sure that my eyes were not fooling me. Hell, she was really smiling. I knew I had no any right to feel disturbed but I am still her lover, right?

Oh! Irrationality!Duas, wake up! You knew it was futile to keep on clinging on something that was barely existing.

"Oh, is that Scythe?" Kira asked.

I looked at him then smiled. "Uhm, yeah! Isn't she beutiful?"

Kira eyed me wearily. He knew that I was hurting more than anyone- more than his own heart aches. "Duas, I know you two are ohnly hanging on a thin thread- more like, you are the only one. But believe me, I know Scythe loves you."