I'll be okay, just not today. [Nochelle/Bryles]

- one year later -

Final chapter!!

One year later.

One thing that I will always be certain of in my life is my hatred for the iPhone alarm. It pulls me from what was turning out to be a really nice dream and into the reality that if I don't get out of bed right now I probably won't get up ever.  It's a lot nicer having my own place, all to myself, I feel like I can do anything I want at any time without having to work around anyone other than myself. 

9am. I'm showered, dressed and ready for work, but my work has definitely changed a lot over the past year. After being given my own column I've spent my work days out doing things and interviewing people and I end up writing most of it up at home, going into my office maybe once or twice a month. I much prefer it like that, I feel like I've been given more creative freedom to produce good quality work. This call is just all about themed content for a few months, with mine already planned so I don't have to worry too much about it all.

An hour later, the calls all done and I'm texting my friends, mainly about what everyone's wearing tonight. Tonight!! Tonight is my little sisters rehearsal dinner, and I'm lucky enough to be her maid of honour, she's getting properly married two days later, nontraditional yes but it worked better for all of us like that. They're all sending pictures of their dresses, accessories and shoes and I feel blessed to have friends who really know how to dress well.

As far as the whole dating thing goes, there hasn't been much going on the past year, I really needed the time to properly heal and rediscover myself, and anyways work has basically become my one true love. I went on a few dates with this guy a couple of months ago but he literally had the worst sense of humour I'd ever seen. I just couldn't. I haven't really vibed with anyone as well as I did with Noah all that time ago, but I'm sure it'll happen eventually.

I spend most of my work day finishing up an article about ballet performances through the 19th century - sounds boring I know but over the course of doing this feature I've gotten more and more interested in dance specifically, I just think the way these people can make their bodies move is amazing - I'm hoping to try a dance class and write about it for an upcoming article pretty soon, I booked a class at a place called 'The Next Step' it's meant to be a private class that I can bring friends to except none of my friends really want to go, I really don't want to go alone but if that's how it has to be then fair enough.

8:30pm. Sat in Abbey and Jordan's rehearsal dinner, I realised my speech was up next. Oh god public speaking has never really been my strong suit, but I guess I'm gonna have to try and push past that now. I stand up and walk over to the small podium in the decorated events hall and clear my throat.

'Is this thing on?' I say laughing into the mic, met with an audience response of more laughter. Okay this can't possibly be that bad. 

'So... my little sister Abbey looks absolutely gorgeous tonight, as does her dapper fiance, and I could not be more happy for her. Around the time they got engaged, I got asked A LOT if I was jealous, with her being a few years younger than me and everything, and if I'm honest I wouldn't have admitted it at the time but I probably was a little. It wasn't exactly envy, I was just jealous of what she had with Jordan, and that she was able to find it at such a young age and hold onto it, and I'd love to have that with someone. It's just pure love between them and if you had told me ten years ago that my 11 year old sister would be getting hitched before 14 year old me I honestly would have laughed. But now seeing them sit there together, I wouldn't have it any other way. Here's to you guys. I love you.' I say raising my glass.