Short Stories

Oddity [Final version] (Limited Time Only)

The Oddity

© 2012 James Janzen

It's a beautiful day. The sun is shining normally, the few birds left are singing. It's too bad I'm about to ruin it, in spectacular design.

I look down, as the wind ruffles my hair. It's a beautiful view, it's almost inspiring. I can see for miles, not that I'd want to. Outside The City, land is barren and desolate. Life outside is scarce. Just like in me.

I stare at my arms again. They are scarred, like most of my body, and sometimes they bleed without warning. Those two words can sum up my entire life. Without warning.Spontaneous. Those words also describe my decision that I have made, that I would turn up here. Standing on the top of a building, staring out at the amazing world.

But despite the amazing world that almost smiles at me, I'm not here for the view, I know that. I've made my decision, I won't turn back now. If I go back down the elevator, people will know. I must do what I intended.

Again, I pause. The view seems to warn me, the wind whispering doubts in my ears. You shouldn't do it. What about your family? Life is not so bad. But it is. If it “wasn't so bad”, I wouldn't have swiped that boy's passchip, which let me into the building. I wouldn't be here. Even so, there are easier ways to do this, certainly. Easier ways for others, but I can't do them. There are so many options, in this day and age. Death is sold at the local corner store. I've already tried.

I guess I'll attempt to go out in style. So I take a step, then another.Will what I do make a difference? Will it change anything? If it does, I don't know what would change. Will people be more careful? Will the world be safer? I don't know. But my life will be removed from the equation of life. Forever.

I take a breath, then another. It's time. I take a step back from the edge of the building, then I run. I jump, flinging myself away from the building. For a moment, I fly. I am floating on air, I am free. Then I am falling.

I fall, quicker and quicker every second. Suddenly my life is flashing before my eyes. I wish it didn't, there's nothing good in what I see. I try to block it out and think of other things, forcing myself to stray from memories that jump into my head. I try to focus on math, I've always been good at it. The formula for gravity jumps into my thoughts. I can hear my science teacher telling the class, “The formula for gravity is gravity equals nine point eight metres a second squared.” I'd try and formulate the speed at which I am falling, but time is now an abstract notion. There is nothing in my world, except a blur of buildings. A world of metal and steel, with the occasional tree sticking out here and there, adding a green tint to the swirl that I am falling into.

Now the ground is growing closer and closer extremely quickly, and my heart skips a beat. Suddenly, I wish I could pause, that I could think this over again a few times. That I could sit in my melancholy room for many more hours, passing time as I lie on my bed, unmoving, contemplative. The choice, now, is out of my hands.

This is something I have hoped for, time and time again. For release from here. It envelops me, and I happily succumb. I embrace it, and suddenly the ground is right in front of me.

Then there is nothing there. There is nothing anywhere.

It's dark again. Or is it dark? I cannot tell. If darkness is the absence of light, then wherever I am is the absence of all. There is no light. There is nothing.

Am I thinking? Am I still alive? From what I know, I shouldn't be alive.

The thought strikes me that I should open my eyes. Funny, I didn't even know that they were closed. I slowly let my eyelids slide open, but they instantly close again. The residual image of light is burned into my retinas. It is bright, and now I realize light has been sinking in through my eyelids all this time. I did not notice before, however.