Let Me Go

Chapter 4

Erica's POV

We got back home with Sarah, who could barely bring herself to walk through the doors without him home.

"But he's not here. He's supposed to be here." She keeps saying.

"Give us a moment?" I ask Pete, as he nods and walks away, "Sarah?" I say, trying to get her attention.

She looks at me, her eyes still red. She was a mess. I was a mess.

"You were his world. You know that." I tell her. "We are all working through this. Brendon left behind so many people."

"This wasn't supposed to happen." She sobs again. I pull her into a hug.

"I don't want you to worry about a thing." I tell her, as she nods, "We'll get through this together I promise." I add.

We go inside finally, as she goes upstairs. I find Pete in the kitchen, drinking a glass of water.

"I c-can't believe it." He says, looking at me now. He was crying now too.

"Babe.." I say, walking over to him and hugging him. "He was living his dream because of you."

As Pete was crying into my shoulder I was wondering Kat was holding up, they've been best friends for so many years, he helped her through everything too.

Breaking the news to more and more people would be hard.

Just then, my phone rang. Pete let go of me as I pulled it out of my pocket.

"You don't have to answer it." He tells me.

"Its Spencer. I have to answer it." I tell him, as he nods.

"Hey Spence." I answer.

"Erica, what happened? He asks me now. I took a breath. I didn't want to start crying again.

"Brendon, he's..." I say. "He's gone, Spencer. He died an hour ago."

He went silent for a minute.

"Oh my god..." is all he says.

"I don't know what to do, Spencer." I say, feeling my voice get shaky.

"We'll figure something out, Erica." He tells me. "I don't want you to worry about it right now..."

"O-okay..."

"Call me whenever you need to." He says.

"B-Bye, Spencer." I say, hanging up. I covered my face with my hands, as Pete looked at me.

"I'm exhausted." He says.

"You and me both. I want today to be over..."

"It's just the beginning. Don't stress yourself out." He says. "I'm going to bed. I love you."

He kisses my cheek, and goes upstairs. I sat for a second looking out the window, replaying what happened in my head.

My big brother, the one who helped me through everything, is gone. He's really gone, and I couldn't do anything about it.

----

Kat's POV

It's been a couple days since his death and I decided to call Dallon first.

"Hey Kat... How are you?" He answers. He sounded tired.

"I've been better. Are you sitting down?"

"Yes.." He says. "What's up?"

"It's Brendon..." I have to pause for a minute, "He um he died the other night.. "

"Spencer already told me, Kat." He says. "Everyone's dealing with it their own way."

"I didn't know who knew so I thought I'd cover all the bases."

"The question is, are you okay?" He asks.

"In all honesty? No I'm not."

"I don't think anyone is. Have you heard from Erica or Sarah?" He asks.

"Yeah. I talked to Erica last night, they're not really okay either."

"Its her brother." He says. "Losing a sibling would be hard."

"I can't imagine. I don't know what I would do if I lost Ryan."

"It'd be hard." He says.

"Yeah." I agree, "Do you know if there's anybody that doesn't know?"

"There's news stories about Brendon. The fans are just waiting on us to say something." He says.

"Should I say something about it or what do we want to do?"

"Just put out a message on the website." He says, as I nod.

I get my laptop to write on the website about Brendon, this is going to be hard.

I took a breath, and started to type.

I know there's something we need to address. I didn't want to, but here I am.

I never thought I would live to see the day where I would be telling you guys this, especially before we were supposed to go on a tour. The other night, I was at the recording studio with Brendon. And only hours later I was at the hospital with his family hoping he was going to get out of this okay.

He was in a car accident, and he didn't survive his injuries. I don't know what to say to you except for I'm sorry.

All of us are grieving. Me, Sarah, Erica, the rest of the band, and many other friends and family of his.

We will be back when we are ready. In the mean time, remember him. Do what you need to be happy again.

-Kat

I post it to the website with a sigh.

Patrick then walks up and sits next to me.

"Hey." I say to him, closing my laptop shut, "I posted a letter to the website finally."

"That must've been hard." He tells me, grabbing my hand. "Pete just called me."

"Whay did he say?"

"He was checking in. Erica's stressed. Her and Sarah are planning his funeral." Patrick says.

I nod, "What am I supposed to tell Declan? Those two were really close..."

"You keep forgetting that you're not alone in this." Patrick tells me. "He's three. It'd be pretty difficult to explain the concept of death to a three year old."

"I-I know but he's going to ask questions, he's like you in that sense and I don't know what to tell him."

"Don't worry about it, okay?" He tells me. "We'll figure it out."

"You're amazing, you know that?" I say resting my head on his shoulder.

"Yeah, so I've heard." He says.