Shattered Hearts

Chapter 48

Despite sleeping for most of the night in hospital Charlotte woke up feeling disorientated. Instinctively she put her hand on her stomach which was now considerably smaller, and after a moment's panic, she remembered she'd had the baby. Slowly her mind began to focus and her breathing returned to normal. 

I have a son, another little boy!

Her heart was so full she would have combusted if that was possible, and she wondered if Louis was as thrilled as she was. She concentrated hard, trying to recall the previous day's events. She remembered the frantic drive to the hospital as her contractions became more frequent and more intense. She remembered the relief on Louis's face as the hospital staff took charge, rushing her straight to delivery. She'd been given some drugs, some sort of pain relief, and after that her memories were hazy. She could see blurred faces and hear far away voices but she couldn't hold onto a definitive moment.

There was a tap on the door and a nurse entered the room. "Your husband's waiting to see you. Shall I show him in."

"Oh, uh, I don't have a husband any more," Charlotte said confused. Surely Nick wouldn't come to see her. "What's he called? My husband?"

The nurse looked at her strangely. "He said his name's Louis, he brought you here yesterday afternoon." She reached her hand out and touched Charlotte's forehead. "Are you feeling okay? It was a difficult labour."

"It was?" She shook her head, wishing she could think more clearly. "I'm fine, tell him to come in."

"Hi," Louis said approaching her cautiously. "How are you?" He put a bouquet of flowers in a vase by her bedside.

"You got me flowers," she said, pushing herself into a semi-upright position. "That's so sweet. Have you seen the baby?"

"Yeah last night, don't you remember? They let me in for a few minutes."

"I'm sorry, it's all a blur." She concentrated on Louis's face, trying to recall the previous evening. She felt him kiss her head, whispering goodbye, but that could be another memory from another time. "So are you happy? About the baby I mean?"

His face broke into a wide smile. "I can't believe you'd ask."

"I guess I'm hoping you feel as happy as I do." She reached for his hand gripping it tightly. "I've wanted another baby for a long time but it's more than that. This time I have a baby with someone I truly love."

He entwined his fingers with hers. "You didn't love Nick?"

She looked away. "Can we not bring him into it?"

"Charlotte?" He forced her to look at him.

"I didn't love him the way I love you," she admitted. "I sometimes wonder if that's why I tolerated his behaviour. Out of guilt. I don't think I loved him the way a wife should love her husband."

"You're right, we shouldn't bring him into this," Louis said stroking her hand with his thumb. "This is our time."

"So what are your thoughts about becoming a daddy?" she asked smiling.

His face broke into a broad smile. "Frankly, I'm terrified. I didn't know babies were so tiny."

"Oh come on, you must have encountered scarier things than this?" Although she was rather apprehensive herself.

"Seriously, no I haven't. So what do you want to call him?"

"I haven't much thought about it," she said, although that wasn't strictly true. "I didn't want to get ahead of myself in case anything went wrong." Inwardly she groaned. "Oh Louis, we're not at all prepared for taking the baby home, we have nothing for him. Well, apart from the baby clothes Darlene gave me."

He cleared his throat. "Now don't get mad, Lottie. You know I respect your opinion and I know why you didn't want to buy things prematurely but-"

"Go on."

"I went on a shopping spree with Darlene, she insisted. We bought a crib, a playpen, blankets, diapers...I don't know what we bought." He looked at her sheepishly, "I'm sure it's all stuff we need."

"Louis." She mock groaned but she was relieved all the same, she might have known Darlene would come through for her. "And what if I don't like what you've bought?"

"I guess I'll take it back."

"I'm joking, I'm sure it's perfect." She managed to sit up properly, ignoring the pain. "Honestly, I can't believe you did that."

"I knew looking at newborn baby things was difficult for you, I didn't want to put you through that unnecessarily."

She swallowed down the lump that was forming in her throat. "I am so lucky."

He met her eyes. "No, I'm lucky."

The squeaking of the door alerted them that they had company. A nurse came in fake coughing to make her presence felt. "Would you like to spend a little time with your baby? He's just been fed."

Charlotte leaned forward. "Yes please." Her son was wheeled towards her in his hospital crib, his eyes tightly closed.

The nurse reached for him and passed him into his mother's arms. "He's a content little thing, barely a murmur."

Charlotte cradled him as Louis leaned closer. "I think I'm going to burst," she whispered. "He's perfect."

"What do you want to call him?" Louis asked, whispering as well.

"I don't care." She looked down at their baby, his eyes still squeezed shut, not giving away which side of the family he took after. "Don't you want him to take your name? Your older brother was named after your dad?"

Louis let out a laugh. "No way, that feels kinda arrogant or something. Like John naming his kid John Junior, I guess it's okay but I wouldn't do it."

"Yeah, it is kinda egotistical." Charlotte looked down at her baby trying to see if he was more Harper or Kinsella. "Okay, we'll come up with a name together. I wish they'd let him stay with me though, I feel like I've hardly seen him."

"It's to give you a chance to recover."

"I know but I feel fine," she said, snuggling the baby closer. "I can't wait to get out of here, and I can't wait to see all the stuff you bought with Darlene."

He frowned at her. "Lottie, have you forgotten you had a blood transfusion? After the baby was born you started haemorrhaging."

"What? Did I? No, I don't remember that." She began to tremble and Louis sat on the side of her bed putting his arm around her.

"Yeah, you're okay now, but you need to rest up." He squeezed her shoulder. "Let the doctors and nurses do their job, they're trying to look after you."

She looked at him frowning. "You make it sound like I'm being difficult."

"You have been somewhat uncooperative."

She gaped at him. "I have?"

"Yeah, the doctors said it was the drugs but from now on, behave yourself."

She looked at him, not sure if he was teasing her. "Surely I haven't been that bad? I mean I wouldn't argue back with a doctor."

He shrugged, "It doesn't matter, your mom smoothed it over."

"Louis?"

He grinned at her. "Relax, I was just kidding with you, kinda."

She opened her mouth to bite back before breaking into a smile. She couldn't be any happier with this idiot man, in fact, she had never been happier.

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