New Girl In Town (1) ✔️

This is Not a Goodbye

Seb: *softly* Princess??
Me: Bastian..... I miss you...

He sighs rather loudly into the phone speaker. "Really Shannon? Because with all that time you're spending with Clarington it doesn't feel like you miss me all that much. I'm not even sure if you mean anything you say anymore." His words actually sting. And I can already feel the tears in my eyes.

"Sebby.... Please don't do that. If you want me to I can call Hunter now, tell him this whole thing is off. I never meant to hurt you. And really I'm hurting all three of us here. But please Sebastian, I still love you desperately. Really I do..." I'm curled up on the couch, clutching to that pillow again. So happy that I'm home alone and no one else is around to witness this phone call.

He's silent for longer than I am comfortable with so I inquire softly.  "Bastian, please tell me, are we okay?  Are we done??"  His voice is just as quiet when he finally replies.  "I don't know.  I don't want to lose you Pretty Girl....  I need you, I do.  I don't want us to be over.  I wanted to marry you.... I still want to marry you.  It just hurts to know that you're really no longer mine."

My hands are picking at the pillow and I'm biting my lip as I listen to his words. He sounds so broken. I can't take it, so I say the words I probably shouldn't in this situation. "Sebby, do you want to come over? I know what I said before but I hate hearing you like this. If you need to see me today I know he would understand. I mean Hunter and I are the ones who blew this whole thing up, he's actually really understanding and flexible about all of this. So if you need to see me.... It would be okay."

"Love, I'm not sure. Do you honestly think that is the best idea right now?"

I'm pacing around the living room now, too nervous to sit still. I feel like I'm letting everyone down all over again. "Bastian, its Valentine's Day. We're both alone right now. I know you've been pouting, moody. I heard...." Sebastian laughs softly as he interrupts me, "So not only has Clarington been hooking up with you behind my back, he's ratting me out now as well. Wow.... What happened to playing fair?"  I can't help the sigh I give.  "Bas stop, I called him earlier to see if anyone mentioned anything at Dalton about Saturday night.   He and I started as friends, so I knew he'd be honest with me, even if I didn't want to hear it."

Sebastian whispers out a soft I'm sorry.... so I continue.  "He told me that no one mentioned anything but that your behavior might start to garner unwanted attention. And I told him that so far only Puck said anything. But he wouldn't be mentioning it to anyone.  Although he cautioned me that secrets have a way of outing themselves eventually."  Sebastian hums in my ear as he processes my words.  "Maybe I should come over, it would stop the Tweedles and Thad from questioning why I'm not with you today.  If you want I can pack a bag and be there in an hour and a half, an hour if there isn't traffic and 45 minutes if I disregard the speed limit."

I try to suppress my inner joy so that I don't sound too exited, "I think I'd like that Sebby. Please just be safe. Don't break any laws okay.... I ordered some Chinese food for dinner, but they always give such large portions so there should be plenty for two people. And I can make some cookies if you like. Aunt Pammy has those cute little pull apart chocolate chip cookies that I can pop in the oven. I mean it isn't going to be an extravagant Valentine's Day, but you'll get to see me..." I can hear the smile in his voice right away, "Love, that would be wonderful. I'll see you as soon as I can. I promise I'll be safe. I love you so very much Shann..."

And with that he disconnects our phone call. I can't help the smile on my face as I practically bounce into the kitchen to preheat the oven and grab out those cookies. My food should be here soon as well, so I set out some plates on the table for dinner. I'm getting ready to sit down to some homework while I wait when I remember one thing.

Hunter.

I need to run this all past Hunter, so he isn't caught completely off guard.

I mean yes, Sebastian still wants to marry me.

Someday.

He is coming over this evening even though we had agreed between the three of us to not do anything, just to be fair. I couldn't let him be alone if he was going to be acting like this. But I'm worried that Hunter will be hurt, even though we are having our dinner date, our first 'official' one since he became my boyfriend, tomorrow. So I send him off a quick text message to let him know what is going on.

To HC🔥:  Hunt, please don't be mad.  Seb's coming over to the house tonight.  I couldn't let him be all mopey today of all days.  He is taking all of this way harder than you and me.  Which just solidifies my 'I'm a horrible person' feeling.  This doesn't mean that I care for him more than you.  I'm not quite ready to use the L-word with you, but yea....  You're pretty awesome and stuff.  😉 So please be okay with this.

I set my phone back down and start reading the novella for my Italian class stopping momentarily when the door bell rings with my Chinese takeout. Just as I set it in the kitchen I hear my phone buzzing with a text message reply.

HC🔥: Angel I could never be mad at you, you're just too adorable. Like a sweet little kitten. My adorably sweet dancer of a girlfriend. 😍 And you're not a horrible person, it's just a really bad situation for us to be in. I'm okay with him being there tonight because it would be hypocritical for me not to be. I DO wish it were me spending the night with you though. Maybe if you join me in LA next year. 😉 But I'll see you tomorrow either way. Ps: you're pretty awesome too. 💞💞💞

I'm smiling to myself, light blush on my cheeks as I read his message. See, this is why I fell for him in the first place.

And speaking of LA, my acceptance for UCLA came in.  The first of the batch of college letters to get here.  It's funny because that is the furthest school away but I must have really impressed them.  They want to give me a rather substantial scholarship to attend,  basically a free ride if I want it.  And I got into the prestigious theatre arts program I wanted too.  So that is actually looking like a possibility, following Hunter to LA.

I think I'll bring my letter along with me tomorrow when I meet him at the diner.  That way he can read for himself.

I'm mentally sorting through my wardrobe for tomorrow's date, debating between outfits when the door bell rings, shaking me from my thoughts of shared milkshakes and playground swings.

Sebastian's here.

I stand, straightening out my sweater and pushing my hair behind my shoulders then walk to open the door.

Quick silent pep talk to steady my nerves.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

And then I open the door.