If I Can't Have You || (N.M.)

Chapter 13

It was stupid.

Us driving to the liquor store in silence with even the slightest notion that somehow a pack of cigarillos and a bucket of hot wings was going to rid us of Calvin. Rid us of fear. Rid us of having to hide.

But still we drove, because in our state of desperation, what other option did we have?

We pulled up to the place and even in broad daylight it had sketchy written all over it.

The sign above the door read OLEY'S LIOU STE as several of the letters had peeled off with time. The concrete was ragged and cracked in odd places, a safety hazard if I ever did see one. What was most off-putting though, was the legless man who seemed to be loitering out front. He sat in a wheelchair off by the ice box, staring at us as we parked the truck.

Nate scowled right back, using his eyes to proclaim that he was the protector of our little pack and that the man better not try anything funny – though I was sure there wasn't much he could do given he was missing two very important limbs.

"You guys come in with me, that guy is weirding me out," he said, still not taking his eyes off of the strange man.

I got out of truck cautiously, agreeing with Nate that there was definitely something unsettling about his presence. Then I took Mir out of her car seat and the three of us entered the small store, careful not to trip over any of the uneven concrete on our way there.

It was freezing when we walked in, the AC on full blast and it wasn't even noon yet. Mir nestled her head into my neck to shield her face from the cold air.

I wasn't saying much because I was nervous.

Nervous that this would be a waste of time and that Nate would be right about me being irresponsible all along.

He could probably sense how on edge I was so he turned to face me and Mir and with a hand on my shoulder he said, "Go grab a couple snacks. I'll handle it."

He held my hand gently then he leaned in to give me a kiss on the forehead before turning around to face the man behind the counter who was giving us a weird look as he tapped his fingers impatiently on the surface in front of him.

Reluctantly, I moved toward the isles while never taking my eyes off of Nate. I saw him reach into his back pocket for the paper and hand it over to the guy who just shook his head then turned around to get the listed items together.

I grabbed Mir a pack of animal crackers and a bottle of Bug Juice then picked up a few things like Doritos and a couple of honey buns for Nate and I. I even picked up a cheap bottle of wine that I figured might come in handy later.

Once I was finished with that I made my way back up to the counter where the cashier was already ringing up the wings and cigarillos and Nate was standing there with his lips pursed, hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth on his feet.

He smiled slightly when he saw me placing the rest of items on the counter.

"Wine?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Hey, we deserve it," I laughed halfheartedly.

We'd see how much we really deserved once we checked out.

The man rang everything else up, Nate paid the twenty bucks, we got our receipt and then...

"Thank you, come again."

That was it.

We both stood there, waiting for something else to happen.

"Uh, everything okay?" the man asked.