Secrets [Zarry]

Prologue

Harry Styles was just a child when he realized he wasn't comfortable being a boy.

He felt like he was in a cage, or trapped in a room surrounded by lines he wasn't allowed to cross.

If he did cross them, he wouldn't be looked at the same.

He would be teased, and called a girl, as if that was an insult.

That had always confused Harry.

He didn't understand why he was made fun of for wanting to wear pink clothes rather than blue, or put flowers in his hair like his sister did.

Once when he was six, as his mother reminded him and the whole family at every reunion, he asked if he could wear a dress to school like the girls did.

His sister teased him for days, his mother thought it was cute, and his father gave him such a look Harry felt like he'd said a curse word.

The older he got, the more confused he became because everything started changing.

His likes and dislikes, the way he viewed the world around him.

Girls began to give him attention, and he tried to do like the other boys and be interested in girls but he just couldn't.

Each time a girl would flirt with him Harry felt sick.

He even told a girl once that when she touched him he felt nauseous.

Which was a mistake, because then he was teased about being gay.

That teasing got so severe Harry swallowed his nausea and asked a girl out.

He dated her only so the teasing would stop, but she didn't know that.

It was then that Harry began to learn he couldn't just say or act how he really felt.

Around that same time in his life, one weekend his mother caught him in her bathroom with her makeup.

Luckily he hadn't applied any yet, no matter how much he wanted to.

Harry lied and said he was looking at the ingredients in the makeup for a school project, and his mother left it alone.

He also remembered the look his stepfather gave him when they were out shopping and Harry became distracted by what was in the Victoria's Secret store window.

At first his stepfather smiled, finding it amusing that Harry was distracted by the lingerie.

But it was when Harry blurted out that he'd prefer it in another color that his smile faded.

Since then Harry learned that his life was much easier if he kept his...urges secret.

If he just blended in with the other boys and pretended it didn't bother him to speak about girls like they were property.

Pretended he liked having hair all over his body, and watching sports.

Most of all, pretending he was heterosexual.

The only outlet Harry had was the journal his sister gave him.

She'd given it to him as a joke because she didn't want it, but she didn't know Harry kept it and had been writing in it.

Recently he had filled up about two pages because he was starting college.

He was going to be sharing a house not too far from campus with his two friends Niall and Louis.

Harry was looking forward to getting away from home and moving on to the next chapter of his life.

A small part of him hoped college would be easier than high school.

Maybe more open minded people, a more diverse and accepting atmosphere.

Harry got chills just thinking about it.

×
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×

Zayn Malik was never someone you would catch pretending to be someone he wasn't.

From day one Zayn was always very certain of what he liked, and wanted to be.

He liked things that were differnet, and sort of out there.

He even had a collection of oddly shaped rocks.

His best friend Liam helped him start that collection years ago.

He'd known Liam since they were kids, and thought of him as a brother.

They finished each other's sentences, dressed alike, and sometimes even looked alike.

The two would be sharing an apartment walking distance from campus, and Zayn couldn't have been more excited.

His best friend and new adventures were two of his favorite things in life.

He'd hated high school, but he had high hopes for college.

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A/N: This was a tiny peek at how Zayn and Harry's characters will be in this book. More Harry than Zayn though, because Zayn's the mysterious one. We all know that.

Warnings/important information:
- mentions of drugs and alcohol
- smut
- heterosexual activity
- bottom Harry
- feminine Harry
- kinks
- etc

****I do not allow translations of this story or any others of mine***

- Zaydrian