Stay

3

I haven't heard anything from Blake since his abrupt departure Saturday morning and I'm not sure how to feel about it. Usually our days apart are filled with sweet text messages or quick phone calls, but nothing has come through my phone except the usual texts from Mel. 

I'm not really sure how to feel about it either. Apart of me says, 'Good, you don't need him or his drama'; while a huge part of me is crying out for him. One thing is for certain - I miss him. I miss his kind words and soft kisses. I miss his large hands as the wander over my body. I miss his-

"M'am, can I get you something?" A middle age woman behind the counter interrupts my thoughts, her hands on her hips in frustration. 

"Yeah, sorry. Large green tea. Black. Please." I tell the disgruntled Tim Hortons employee.

"Want any cream or sugar?" She asks. 

"Black, please." I repeat and she stares at me, waiting. "No cream and sugar."

"$2.10." I hand her some change. "Your order will be to the side."

"Thanks." I mutter as I walk away. 

It's Monday morning. Usually I would meet Blake here and we would share a bagel together. Instead, I am all alone. My eyes gazing over the small restaurant in hopes to land on a certain married man. When they come up empty, I sigh and turn back to the counter to wait for my order. 

"Here you go, hun. Have a nice day." Another worker says to me as she hands me my tea. 

"Thank you, have a great day." I smile, but it doesn't reach my eyes. 

I'm quick to leave the restaurant, heading in the direction of my office that is a mere 10 minute walk away. However, the walk seems long and cold today without Blake with me. I hold my tea tighter and walk a little quicker, trying to shake thoughts of him away. 

There must be a reason he hasn't called. There must be a reason he was so angry with me when I called him Saturday. There must be something to explain his sudden absence. 

Worry fills me. What if he doesn't want me anymore? What if I scared him away with all my talk? As much as I don't want to share him with Carol, I would hate to lose him altogether. That would tear me apart. He makes me feel so complete, so happy, and I don't ever want to not have him with me. 

The office doors come into view and I quickly shake all thoughts of Blake from my head. Once I enter that office, I leave all my problems at the door. It's something my college professor taught me and I have always stuck by it. 

Painting a fake smile on my face, I push through the heavy, glass doors and enter Richardson Enterprises. 

"Good Morning Miss. Garrett. How are you on this fine day?" Larry, the doorman, greets me cheerfully. He is an older man - in his early 60s - and he has worked for the company for years, definitely earning his retirement that is coming sooner than he cares to admit. 

"I'm wonderful, Larry. How are you?" I smile - a true, genuine smile. He always makes me smile.

"I'm fantastic. You keep a smile, you hear?" He says, the same words he speaks every morning. 

"Always. I will see you later." 

I head towards the elevator and squeeze in with the other workers who occupy it. Smells of coffee and pastries fill the air, reminding me that I didn't have my bagel to start the day. 

As the elevator doors begin to close, a deep voice yells out 'Hold the door'. 

A young man around my age puts his foot out, stopping the doors and making me groan.