Dear Lauren,
I've been seeing you a lot on my Instagram recently. I don't know why. I'm always so tempted to like the pictures but then Camren shippers are going to notice and they are going to freak out. The last thing you need is any drama that includes me. While we are on the topic of 'camren' I need to ask you something. Why did you say it wasn't real? In my eyes Camren is real. That hurt a little when you said and I quote;
"no I hate it because it's invasive, scary, delusional, disrespectful to us both, and was never real... ever."
Were we never real? Was this all in my head? You called me your girlfriend and you treated me like one so why did you say it wasn't real? Why did you say that and not even consider my feelings? How come you didn't ignore it? I don't know what to think anymore. That isn't going to stop me for caring about you or stop me from loving you. The feelings I have for you are really strong. I'm sorry I feel like this. I shouldn't and you shouldn't either but I know you don't anymore. Im sorry for leaving the band when you needed me. Tell Dinah that I'm sorry for not being there to annoy her. Tell Normani that I'm sorry she didn't win on dwts and that she clearly should've won. Tell Ally that her new song is great and I'm sorry for not being there to support her. I'm sorry for everything. Maybe one day you and the girls will forgive me but maybe you won't. I hope you guys do though. I want it to be like it used to. I just want you guys by my side again. You guys are my sisters. We've been through a lot together. I hate that I left but at least good things came out of it. I can fully express myself through my music and you guys are closer than ever. You guys deserve each other. I'm glad you guys are there and support each other. Writing all of this is hurting my hand but I just need to get these feelings/thoughts out. Maybe I'll just let them out another time because I need to go back to writing my song. You always told me to keep writing songs and I am. I hope you like it when it comes out.
X,
Camila C.
