Daniel Seavey
➵
I glance at the clock and sigh.
3:18 a.m.
I sit up in the dark, giving up on trying to sleep. When I do, I make out the softest sound coming down the hallway. (y/n)'s figure passes my bedroom, probably going downstairs.
I wait for several minutes but she doesn't come back upstairs. Beginning to worry, I slip out of bed and make my way down the staircase in the Why Don't We house.
A single light over the kitchen island is on, illuminating (y/n) leaning against it on her elbows, head hanging low to the metal surface.
When I enter the room, she hears me, looks up, and smiles faintly.
She's beautiful. No makeup, sweatpants, hair pulled back out of her face. Her eyes shine like they always do but unmistakable creases and lines on her face convey something. She's in pain.
"Hey, Daniel," she says quietly. "I'm surprised you're up."
"I haven't slept at all tonight - well - this morning. I saw you come down here and just... wanted to make sure that you're alright."
The sides of her mouth threaten to pull into a grin. She looks away from me and focuses on her folded hands instead.
"I'm fine."
"Really? You look like... you're in pain. Why are you awake?" I ask her gently. I can't keep the concern from my voice.
"Um... well, I'll just be honest with you, I guess," she says, glancing up at me. "I hope I don't make you feel uncomfortable but... before my period I always get really bad cramps. To the point where, you know, I wake up in the middle of the night and can't go back to sleep. But, it's part of life so...."
She shrugs, looks at me again. I shake my head slightly.
"How do you... I don't understand how every woman on earth can survive going through that every month."
She's laughs and then covers her mouth, probably remembering what time it is.
"It's okay, Daniel, really. It's just... life. It sucks and hurts but it's life," she says.
"Are you... in pain right now?" I ask her.
She nods. I move closer to her in the room. All I want to do is wrap my arms around her, hold her....
I stop walking when she begins speaking again.
"It's not as bad as it usually is right now. It sort of... well, of course some women don't have cramps at all, but for those who do, it's different for each. Mine comes in waves of a sort. Kind of like dull pain and then -bam! - it's there."
I chuckle and then immediately regret it.
"I'm sorry, that wasn't funny and I shouldn't have laughed. You being in pain isn't-"
"Daniel, stop worrying. It's okay," she assures me. "Oh my word, you're so sweet, you can't even help it... you don't have any reason to apologize. It was just a passing comment."
I stare at her as she messes with the hoodie strings of her sweatshirt.
"Do you need anything?" I ask, breaking myself away from my gaze.
"No," she says, shaking her head. "I think I'm going to head upstairs and... try to sleep."
When we climb the stairs together, I walk slightly behind her right shoulder. I almost put my hand on the small of her back on our way up, but stop myself.
Don't push it. You don't know what she wants. Control yourself.
***
I stare at Daniel's profile in the dark as he looks around the empty hallway, probably killing time to stay out here. Following his jawline, I feel the urge to hug him, kiss him... but know I can't.
I'm living in the Why Don't We boys' house solely until I have enough leverage in my photography and music career here in L.A. to support myself and buy my own apartment. I can't get caught up with this boy that I so badly want to be mine. That would be crossing the line of what I'm permitted to do as a guest in his house.
"Are you sure you're alright?" Daniel whispers.
"Yes," I whisper back, almost laughing again. He cares so, so much. My heart hammers with excitement.
"Okay." His head points toward the ground for a moment before lifting to look at me. I can just make out his eyes staring into mine in the dark.
My entire body tingles.
I love this boy. I am literally in love with Daniel Seavey.
Tension is tight like a rope between us. It's been sparking since I moved in.
"Goodnight, (y/n)."
I try to respond but can't.
He pushes his bedroom door open and I turn to walk down the hallway.
Why do you keep running from him? Why do you keep turning away from what you want?
"Daniel," I say, turning back to him.
"Mhm?" He reappears in the doorway.
"I need...." I trail off, emotions caught in my throat.
Something flashes in his eyes. He moves toward me very slowly.
"You need what?" he says, voice low.
Seconds tick by. He moves closer to me. Inches away... centimeters....
We're staring straight into each other's eyes, both knowing that in this moment, the tension will finally be broken.
I know I should answer him, but I can't. His breathing pattern matches mine: an unsteady rhythm of nerves.
His hand trails through my hair, cupping my neck, and then suddenly, he's kissing me.
A wave of ecstasy crashes over my body and my stomach flips over itself, but not because of cramps.
