Die to Live

Chapter 6: "Lost"

Dear readers, I hope you are liking the story so far, if not, any suggestions are very welcome also if any questions you can leave them in the comment section and I will gladly answer.

Keep reading guys, we are getting closer to the big surprise! Don't forget to vote! 💚

If you are one of those readers who like to listen to music while reading, I suggest for this chapter the song "Lay me down" by Sam Smith, It will get you all the feels of this heartbreaking chapter. Enjoy💙

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"Jane?"

I called her name as a tear rolled down her cheek. I intended to dry it with my hand but she harshly stopped me. Every time she cries it feels like a thousand knives against my heart and even more, when I was reason.

"Don't touch me!" She stepped back. "Don't ... Don't you ever, in your life, touch me again. God, Vincent I hate you so much. I FUCKING HATE YOU!"

She started to scream at me, telling me horrible things, rubbing my mistakes to my face... but I couldn't hear anything. I didn't want to believe them either, we were soulmates and she was just hurt, she didn't mean those words. She knows I would never do those things in purpose... but I guess I can't hide the sky with my hand. I just... I can't control it I really wish I could. God, it's so hard.... she's my world! Without her, I just.. I cant do this.

She was mercilessly punching my chest again, and again, and again. And I... I just stood there motionless, reactionless. I closed my eyes and swallowed my words, I wanted to speak but I've already said enough, in fact, I said more than I should've.

"Don't even think about going back for me. I wish I never met you Vincent...."

"Please, Ja... "

"Just, don't. Stop. Whatever it is I don't want to hear it."

She stopped punching me, turned her back for a few seconds and I swear I could hear my pulse raising, and again she turned around to face me face to face. With all her strength, she tried not to cry but her tears fell one behind another, second by second crushing my heart into a million pieces as her eyes penetrated mine.

"Who are you..?"

"I'm sorry Jane, I am. Please, don't say that to me. You are all I have, you cant leave me, Jane."

I followed her but she ignored me. I was dying inside...

Don't know when it started, but I was drowning in tears. Tears in vain because I knew, she was not going to forgive me for what I did. I lost her the moment I did it, I gave her up and realized this when I saw her grabbing her bag, then walked towards the door and closed it with all her strength. I lost her, I just lost myself....

I chained my head to the ground as the tears rolled down my neck in silence. In that emptiness I felt inside me, around the house, a space a thousand persons at a time couldn't fulfill. I swear I've never felt so broken in my life, not after my parents death and I dare to say this hurt me even more.

I started to scream without hesitation, without caring what the neighbors would say or hear. My anger was so much stronger than I could ever imagine. I didn't know what to do with it but to punch everything in my way.

I ran to the closed door where she left, looked at it for a few seconds and threw a punch with my already cut hand, so hard that it broke the crystal door. Blood again started to peek, but I was so numb I didn't care. Fury exploded out of me. I looked at the house, and I just can't explain the feels. My fingers all tangled in my hair, my face a waterfall. I grabbed the lamp beside me and threw it against the wall, then the table that was holding it. I went to the kitchen and the mess was still there, the mess I made. I looked for the knife I was using earlier and when I found it, slowly, my hand shaking, I took it and sobs started to pour.