The Memoirs of Theolon

Entry 5

I think the thing that I hated most about my family was me. I was the only child, and I was doted upon and loved upon and the life givers knew everything about what was going on in my life, even if I tried to hide it from them.

Schooling in Soirwe was a lot like your modern human times; both females and males went to school, ran for twelve echelons or so, and you went on with your life afterwards.

I was in my twelfth echelon, I'm pretty sure, when it happened. I had this one friend, an unbelievably tall idiot. He enjoyed calling me a nature nut, because of my magic. More on that later.

I had come to school one day and I remember noticing how pretty he looked. I don't know what he had done differently, he looked normal, dark hair dark skin dark eyes, but he just looked... pretty.

Of course we had talked about love and puberty and all that shit in school, and in that class we also talked about the different ways people can love. At the time, I didn't really care about the class, but now that I think about it, it would've been useful to me in the coming years.

To make a long story short, I debated over this subject - how my best friend was fucking pretty to me - and at long last, I came to the conclusion that I was gay.

I still am, if you're wondering. This one's not a lie. Just instinct.

I realized I was gay, and then I decided not to talk to my friend for the next couple of weeks. This was still in my twelfth standard, I believe. I remember thinking how I was so close to graduating and leaving the shithole I was in. Angsty teen thoughts. The usual.

Ha. Angst. If only I knew.

The idiot I was.

He confronted me, one day after school. It was a sunny day, warm, and I wanted to stretch my wings in the forest behind my house. Not a home, but still my house. 

Anyways, I had reached the boundary of my forest, and then I turned around and I saw him. I had thought that he followed me home, but really, we had been friends for so long he knew my house inside and out.

He didn't yell at me, I remember that. He had taken my arm and dragged me into the glade, sat me down, and asked my what was wrong.

I remember just staring at him, basking in his beauty. He was absolutely, unabashedly so pretty.

I had realized that I loved him just then. I thought there was only one thing I could do.

I leaned in and I kissed him.