Painful Love-(Ticcimask fan fiction)

Why?

I love this photo! All the feels bro, and brodets!
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Time skip, 3 months later
Toby's POV
The voices won't stop, no matter how many pill I take, they won't stop! Their hurtful words ring on my ears, and now, they talk even when I'm not alone.  I haven't talked to anyone in about a month, they're trying to help me, but the voices won't let me talk.
I walked downstairs and into the living room, where Jeff and BEN were of course playing video games, Masky and Hoodie were on the couch. I think Sally and Jane were in the kitchen. When I entered the room all eyes were on me. Digging into my soul, silently judging, or so I thought. Masky then broke the silence.
"Hey Toby! How are you?"
"....."
"Toby what's wrong? You haven't been talking to anyone except the voices!"
"....."
"Toby, please! Tell us what's wrong!" Masky pleaded.
"I-I can't," I replied. My voice was rough and small.
"Yes you can Toby! Please tell us!" Masky continued to plead.
I sighed.
"T-the voices won't stop." I said slowly, with tears forming in my eyes.
"Then why don't you jut take some pills?" Jeff asked as BEN paused the game.
"I did. They still talk to me, their to strong! I don't know why, but they want me dead! They want me crying! They want me to suffer!" I semi-yelled while crying.
Masky came over and gave me a much needed hug. But the pain was still there. He smiled and smiled back, only for my smile to turn to a frown when Masky asked what the voices said to me.
"They tell me to stab myself, and that no one loves me. That I'm a faggot, worthless, a waist of space. A loser! And that not even Lyra loved me. That I deserve to hurt. That I killed Lyra." My sobs became louder.
"Toby. No matter what they say, do. Not. Listen. To. Them." Masky said in a serious tone.
"I CANT STOP LISTENING TO SOMETHING INSIDE MY HEAD! THEIR ALWAYS GOING TO BE HERE!! MOCKING ME! TEASING ME! KILLING ME FROM THE INSIDE OUT! IM LOSING THE BATTLE INSIDE MY MIND!!!" I yelled. I took out my pocket knife and started cutting at my hands and wrists, another bad habit I have.
"TOBY! Stop that now!" Hoodie said as he ran over to me, along with the rest. Ej picked me up and ran to Dr. Smilies room. He layed me on the table and stepped me down with restraints. He hooked me up to an IV bag and sat beside me. He examined me.
"Toby," he said in a relaxed soothing tone.
"Y-yes?" I asked quietly.
"You need to calm down ok. Listen,  what the voices say to you are not real. What the voices say to you, are what you think of yourself as. All those things you said, only fuel the voices, they learn what to say from what you say and think. Once they know it, they can't stop. There's nothing we can do about it now. Plus, you are scaring us. You're scaring Sally the most, she doesn't like when you're like this Toby. Do you really want Sally to be scared?" Ej said with the same soothing tone.
"No, Ej. I just want to be happy. I want all of us to be happy, not scared. It's just hard not to listen to them when their talking. I can't even here anyone else talking when they talk." I said sadly.
"Don't worry, it'll be ok Toby." Little did he know, things were not going to be ok, they were only getting worse.
"Ok... can I go now?" I asked as Ej got up.
"Yep!" Ej said as he undid the restraints.
"Bye Ej! Bye Smilie!" I said with a smile.
"That's the Toby we know and love?" Smilie said returning a smile. They really did like me.
'No they don't'
'They hate you'
'They only want you happy so you don't complain!'
'They never like you!'
'Worthless price of shit'
'Ugly fatass'
'Just die already, they won't care!'
The voices continued, until I made it to the living room. I sat on the couch next to Masky and Hoodie, until Slender called us for dinner. I sat in front of Sally and beside Masky. Slender always gave me much smaller portions than everyone else, he knew I wouldn't eat more than the small portion. Sally look up at me weirdly, then continued to eat.
"Hey Toby!" Sally said happily.
"Yes, Sally Wally?" I asked sadly, with a fake, forced smile.
"How come you don't eat as much as the rest of us?" The room went silent.
"Because Sally, I don't like eating much, and I don't want to waist any more food than I have to." I said quietly, my forced smile fading to a frown.
"What happened Toby? You used to be so happy and fun. Now you're all sad, and you don't talk much." Sally said with a frown.
"I'm real sorry, Sally. But I just don't see the point in holding on anymore. I'm a waist of space, a waist of air. There's nothing in my life to be happy about. The one person who loved me is dead, my own mom probably burned to death. The worst part is... if I wasn't born, none of that wouldn't have happened. My sister would be alive. I put to much strain on my family. And... now she's dead because of it. I just don't see a reason to be happy." I said. The room still so silent, you could here a pin drop. The silence overwhelmed me, and the voices started again.
'Awww... would you look at that. The fat ass actually does listen to us. Very good. Toby, you are a disgusting fat ass that is weak and  stupid. You deserved a life even worse then the abuse. A faggot like yourself should just die already. Come on, there's a knife right there on the table. Just stab it through your heart! It's not that hard Loser.'
"I believe you. But that doesn't mean it can't get better." I said, not realizing I said it out loud. Oops. I got some weird looks. But we focused back onto dinner until Hoodie tried to lighten the mood.
"Ahem... anyways... What do you guys want for Christmas, it's only 2 weeks away?" Hoodie asked.
"I want 3 things!
1. For Uncle Toby to be happy again
2. For uncle Toby to eat the same as the rest of us, cause he's to boney went he tries to pick me up
3. I want Uncle Toby to stop crying at night and letting the blood from his arms get onto the bed. Then Jane has to wash them twice." Sally finished.
"Sally! You told me you wouldn't tell anyone!" I said angry that she was telling everyone about my bad cutting habit.
"Sorry Uncle Toby!" Sally screamed.
I got up without eating and went into my room. I didn't want to here peoples reactions. I didn't want to here them complain about how weak I am. I already know. I curled up in a ball with my back to the locked door. I sobbed and cut, then sobbed some more, until I finally past out because of blood loss. Finally, peace within my mind.
Masky's POV
Why didn't Toby tell any of us? I miss the old Toby. The happy, giddy, Toby. He used to be so
Cute and I loved him. What happened that made him like this? I knew the voices were bad, but not this bad! He never told us that he cut. I never heard him cry, how did Sally know.
"Since when does Toby cry at night?" I asked, slightly confused.
"He's always cried at night. We all go to his room and he tells us about his nightmares. We hug him, and try to help... but nothing ever works. Toby says that something is wrong with him, but he can't tell us. He says that if he does, it would make it worse. Says something's controlling his mind and he can't think straight. I feel bad, I'm crazy but I've never felt like that!" Jeff said while he took another bite of his potatoes. My smol bean is going crazy! I have to help him somehow, but I don't even know what's wrong with him. My friend is  troubled, and needs love.

??? POV
I see my little servant is going crazy... maybe this is the best time to bring him, he won't like it here. But I need him. My servant, my slave, my soon to be love.
Mwahahhahaha