Painful Love-(Ticcimask fan fiction)

Heartache through the pain

Masky's POV
Toby is much more social now, and every night we play games like truth or dare... and stuff like that. Toby comes every night. He says that it helps the voices go away, and that he is scared to be alone, in fear that Zalgo might kidnap him again. It's much harder to talk to Toby now though. He doesn't talk that much, and when he is, he's talking to the voices. He won't leave my side either. He said that I was the only one truly trustworthy, other than Lyra. But Lyras dead. He doesn't cut himself that much anymore, but sometimes you'll see an extra cut or two. He also sleeps in my bed, because he loves me, and when he's with me he doesn't get horrible nightmares. Which means everyone can sleep peacefully. But I can't help notice, that Toby never takes off his gear anymore, even when he sleeps. And he never smiles anymore either... I don't know what Zalgo did to him, but Toby's just not the same. I was walking through the hall to my room, when I noticed that Toby wasn't following me, I didn't think much of it and continued to my room. When I arrived, I heard small sobs from the inside. I opened the door to see Toby, a crying bloody mess on the floor. I ran over to him.
"TOBY! What happend!?"
"M-Masky! I-I was f-following you u-until t-the voices s-started. B-but I-I heard a-a n-new voice! I-it was Z-Zalgo. A-and he s-said that I-if I don't t-try a-and k-kill myself, t-than h-he would k-kidnap and t-torture me a-again!"
"Don't worry, Toby. I would never let that happen. Now we need to get you cleaned up, ok?"
"Ok"
"Come on Babe."
He followed me into the bathroom where I got out the first aid kit and disinfected his cuts. His tics got even worse, and he twitches a lot too.
"Toby, you wanna take off your mask and goggles please? I need to check there too." I asked
"Um... no thanks. Trust me, there's nothing there you want to see." Toby said sadly.
"*sigh* ok then. Hey Toby, how come you never smile anymore?" I asked while I hugged him.
"The day my sister died is coming up... and my mom's birthday. I wanted to give her a really good gift this year, but I can't really do that." Toby said. I felt something wet stained my shirt. Toby was crying. No, not crying... sobbing. Loudly. Like every ounce of sadness pent up inside him came out in a fit of tears. Apparently it was much, much, louder than I thought. Cause Slenderman teleported inside the bathroom.
"Masky? Toby? What's wrong? What happened?" Slender asked, I think he was worried. Slender had a soft spot for the twitching kid. Slender acted kinda like a dad, since Toby's was an ass hat. If he was still alive, I would have killed him by now.
"Slender! I'm sorry you have to see me in such a weak state. I promise it won't happen again sir!" Toby stammered.
"Tobias, its fine. We all have to cry sometimes. Except Jeff, I don't even think he can cry. But we all feel. Oops, uhh... well not pain, I mean emotionally. Hehehe." Slender continued awkwardly.
"Slender it's fine, I know what you mean. The problem is that,
1. Zalgo has become one of my voices in my head,
2. My sisters death day is coming up, and
3. My mom's birthday is complete my up and I had a whole huge thing planned for this year, but as you know... I can't do anything for her this year." Toby finished. Slender looked... sad?
"Toby... your mother is dead. She died in the fire you started." Uh, oh.
Toby's POV
What?! I-I killed my mom. I'm a monster! SHE DID NOTHING WRONG YET SHE DIED!!! A-and it was my fault. I wanted to cry, but the tears didn't come. A wave of quilt hit me. I felt extreme guilt and sadness. I never wanted her to die. The two most important girls in my life are dead. My brain went blank. The only thing I could think of, was Christmas. Or my birthday. My mom tried so hard to support for my family. And now she's dead... because of me. A strange thought flowed though my head. My mom and sister are in heaven, my dads in hell. We could be a happy family again, without him. The only thing missing... is me. I could be with them, happy, like I always wanted. But then again... would they want me to die? I have a new family now. I have Masky, and Slenderman, and everyone else. I will be with my true family. Just not now... my new family and my old would t want me to ale my own life. But that doesn't stop me from feeling guilty still. My mother... dead. I just could t get it threw my head. WHY DID SHE HAVE TO BE DEAD TOO!!!!??? Then I realized I spaced out. I looked up to Masky. Then to Slender. I walked past them and out of my room. I received some worried and off stares, but I didn't pay attention. I walk right passed them and out of the mansion. I just needed a moment to myself. Silence took over the woods. I sat for what seemed like hours, until the sun finally start to set. I got up slowly, and walked back to the mansion, taking my sweet time. By the time I got back the sun had set fully, and the stars shined brightly. This is why I liked the woods at night. The stars shine so much brighter than they do in the city. No blinding lights to make them duller. I finally made it to the mansion and walked right in. Everyone was downstairs and were about to start their game of truth or dare. I really did try to stay social, so I walked over and sat down.
"So... what are we playing tonight?" I whispered slowly.
"Oh... umm hi Toby!"asks said quietly.
"Are you ok Toby?" Jeff asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Not like my life's falling apart or anything... but other than that, I'm fine. Just a little shook." I replied. A small smile forming on my lips. I haven't smilies in so long, that I almost couldn't do it, and my lips quivered slightly, but still noticeable. Everyone smilies back.
"Tonight, since Sally isn't here, we divided that we will play, 7 minutes in heaven!" Jane said with a smirk. What the heck was that? Usually we play truth or dare.
"Umm... w-what's that game?" I asked shyly. Everyone looked at me on aw. Masky leaned into my ear and told me the game. Heat rushes to my cheeks. I thought about those times I was raped, I didn't want to be touched like that again.
"Do I have to play? I don't want to be touched like that yet." I said once again shyly.
"Oh come on Tobes!" Jeff said as he nudged me.
"You're the reason I don't want to play. I don't want to be touched like that again." I said. Masky hugged me.
"It's ok Toby. If you don't want to play, you don't have to, ok?" Masky said sweetly.
"Mmm... ok." I said, once again trying to Smilie but failing terribly. Everyone laughed. I hate when people laugh at me, but I tried to convince myself that they were laughing with me, not at me.
Suddenly Jane spoke after a good laugh.
"Well, let the games begin!"