Oh the King of drinking, he's either drunk all the time or just really good at hiding it when he is. This make's your job super easy since you know he can't resist the taste of spiced rum. Take it, and hide it. I recommend your locker or something, just out of reach and under his nose to where he can almost smell it. It'll drive him crazy, but give it back to him after you and whoever else you tell have your laugh.
Who can resist the big lug? ;)
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101 More Ways to Annoy Red vs Blue
Fanfic101 Ways to Annoy Red vs Blue PART 2?!!! WHAT UP PEOPLE! (kill me please)