On The Front Lines

8

I looked out of the window as we pulled up to the church. The girls and the team were in the limo with me and the entire ride here, there was only silence. When I car stopped, everyone got out except for Kat, who was looking at me as I just sat there.

            "Bailey, if you need a few minutes, we can handle greeting everyone," she said and sat her hand on top of mine.
            I looked at her with a straight face, "No, I'm ready to get this over with so I can take my family home and we can rest," I told her and got out of the car.
            They was standing at the top of the steps, greeting people as they walked in. I looked at the cross atop the building and took a deep breath before I walked up to them. When I reached the top of the steps, they all looked at me.
            I sighed, "Before we going I just to let you all know how much it means to have friends like you guys. The last ten months have been hard and the last week has been a circus, I know. I know I put you through a lot; especially these two," I nodded to Courtney and Kat. "I honestly don't think I could've gotten through any of it without y'all and I'm very grateful, for everything. I love y'all," I smiled.
            They all smiled back then we huddled together, said our family prayer, then went inside and took our seats. The church was packed with people. They were lined along the walls and even the balcony was filled. One thing I could honestly say about Jay was that he touched a lot people.
            It began to quiet down as Poppa J walked up to the podium. "Good morning," he started. "On behalf of the family, I would like to thank you all for coming out as we remember and celebrate the life of Jason Jerome Hampton Jr...."

            "...and for that, I am forever thankful that God put Jay Jay, my brother, in my life. I'll never forget the great times or the worst and I will always carry you my heart. I love you, bro," Co finished her speech.
            "Thank you, Courtney," Poppa J said as Co sat down on my right. "And now, we'll have a few words from Jason's wife. Bailey," he nodded to me and I stood, smoothing my dress as I made my way to the podium.
            I looked around the crowed room, all eyes fixed on me. I put my head down and chuckled, "You know, I spent all night and this morning thinking about what I would say when it was my turn. From that point to now, I still haven't come up with more than 'Good morning'," I said and they laughed. "It's crazy because I'm a multimillion dollar publisher and as I stand here, my mind is blank. I think, maybe, it's hard to believe my husband is lying in this casket in his favorite Tom Ford suit." I laughed to myself, "I remember the day he bought it and got it tailored; he said 'I gotta be buried in this'. I laughed as he went into the explanation of how he should be buried in his military suit but once he saw this one, he just knew. Then started dancing and feeling on the jacket like he was caressing it; which made me laugh more.
            "He always kept a smile on my face, a real one," I smiled. "Ever since the night we were just like 'forget it, let's be together'. It was no use in hiding how we felt about each other; it was like a magnetic pull we had towards each other. I can honestly say I knew he was that guy by the third week. We would've been together for almost seven years next month.
            "In the last ten months, I have had the hardest time dealing with his absence; on top of my unexpected pregnancy," the tears began to fall. "Going through all that I have without him; I'd never wanted to give up on anything more than I wanted to with this. I'll be honest, it wasn't easy at all- even with the support of my family. There were nights I would wake up out of my sleep in a cold sweat, crying but I kept my faith.
            "Lord knows, I miss him; I have since the day he left. I love him even more now than I did that day because he gave me the best gift I could ever ask for. And, if you were close enough, I'm sure you know how good of a gift you would get from Jay. My only wish is that we could enjoy it together," I said as my voice cracked. "I can't think of a better way to spend the last seven years of my life. It tears me apart knowing I won't be able to hear that laugh we all loved or see that smile that could lift everyone in the room but I'll always have the memories." I looked at the casket for the first time and smiled, "I love you, Doo," I whispered before going back to my seat.
            Kat rubbed my back as I wiped my eyes with the handkerchief Pooh gave me. After the closing prayer, Co, along with Jay's brothers and best friend, carried the casket out, with us following behind.

            "How you feeling, sis?" Dionne asked as she sat with me on the deck in the yard.
            I shrugged, "I'll be alright." I looked at the rest of the group at the bar as I sipped from my glass. "It's the same as the past ten months- he's not here."
            "Hey, what are y'all talking about over here?" Tay asked as she and everyone else took their seats around the fire pit.
            "Can y'all believe we've been doing this for six years?" Co said as she stared at the flames.
            Tay shook her head and smiled, "We've done so much, it's crazy. The seven of us dominating the world has truly been an adventure and I wouldn't want to have had it with all of you," she said and started crying on cue.
            "Lawd, I can't with her," D commented and we all laughed at Tay's fake tears.
            She wiped her eyes, "You don't have to," she turned to D and smiled, "I have my Oscar."
            We all laughed again. Tay is truly a character, it never fails with her.
            "Where did you come from?" Kat asked, still laughing.
            Tay sat up straight as she turned to Kat and put her hand on her knee, "Well sweetie, when two people love each other very much, they ha-"
            "Shut up, Tay," Pooh laughed, holding his side.
            She laughed then held up her glass, "To our family and our guardian angel. Rest Jay," she toasted and we clinked our glasses together. "Now," she turned to Co, "let's talk about your Kevin Hart looking ass trying to carry the casket, struggling," she told Co and we laughed as they went back and forth.