Teach Me - Dallas Winston Fanfiction

Twelve.

That sense of invincibility that comes with the night always finds a way to shrink away with the morning.

Once again, I found myself sitting up in bed to look out into Buck's upper room. There was an empty bottle of whiskey on the nightstand next to me and just the sight of it made my head spin. I frowned as I recognized the empty space beside me, trying to remember the events of the night. Dallas and I had had sex again, that much I was sure of, but I couldn't remember what unfolded afterwards. I glanced towards the adjoining bathroom to see the door open and the mirror slightly fogged up, but no Dallas. From what I could hear, the downstairs of the bar sounded completely empty.

After combing out my hair with my fingers for a few moments, I slipped on my jeans and started towards the stairs. I found out I was correct as I reached the first floor. Empty, other than Buck, who was cleaning behind the bar and whistling to himself.

"Uh," I started, making him jump slightly, "Hey."

He tilted his head at me, "Morning."

I glanced back at the stairs, motioning over my shoulder, "Dallas..."

"Is gone," Buck finished for me, "Left about an hour ago."

"Left?" I repeated, tugging on my shirt, "Did he say when he was coming back?"

"He's not coming back, doll," He gave me a funny look, "Not until tonight, I'd assume."

He started pouring a mug of coffee as I tried to make sense of the situation. Dallas left? Without me? He just got up and left? Without me?

"Here, hon," Buck called as he laid the coffee on the bar.

I walked over and took a slow seat on the stool, picking the coffee up, "Uh, thanks."

Buck watched me as I took a few cautious sips. I was still taking small glances at the staircase, as if willing Dallas to just show up there. He couldn't have just...left.

Finally, Buck just sighed, "You don't know much about Dallas Winston, do you?"

"I've known about him my whole life almost," I shrugged, "I guess I don't know him, though."

"No, I reckon you don't, especially since I've never seen you in my bar before. Where'd he find you, anyway?"

"Tim Shepard's couch," I told him with a roll of my eyes.

"Shit," He drawled, "No kidding? You Tim's girl?"

"I'm his sister."

Buck furrowed his brow and I was sure he was trying to place if I was Angela or not.

"Victoria," I frowned, "The good sister."

"If you say so," He chuckled, pushing a mop around the bar to start on the floor.

I spun around on my stool to watch him, "What did you mean I don't know about Dallas Winston?"

Buck looked up from the floor and smirked at me, "I've never had a broad come down the next morning and ask me where Dallas went. They all know where Dallas went- anywhere that wasn't here. They usually just find their pants and head out the front door as fast as they can. You're the first one I've seen that actually thought you'd be waking up next to him."

"I'm not a one night stand," I tried to argue, but my voice faltered slightly as I remembered Dallas' words.

You don't think we're like together or something now?

Good, cause we ain't.

I just want to make sure you ain't going to get all clingy and shit over it. Like, come looking for me trying to ask what you mean to me or something like that. It wasn't anything, it was just some drunk sex, alright?

I set the coffee back down on the bar with a thud, causing Buck to raise his eyebrows.

"He said he liked me," I nearly whispered. I wasn't sure if I was talking to myself or Buck.

All the same, I saw Buck's bemused expression falter as he heard my words. He didn't seem to know what to say and I felt a little bad that he was having to deal with Dallas' mess. I knew I should have just left, but it was a long walk home and I wasn't ready for it yet.

"He's at the stables," Buck muttered after a moment.

I tilted my head, "Sorry?"

"It's Thursday, so Dallas is at the stables," He explained, motioning in a direction down the road, "He'll be there all day, I'll bet, if you want to go talk to him."

"Thanks," I stood up from the stool, taking a final gulp of coffee, "But I think I better just go home."

"I could give Tim a call, see if he can come get you?"

I shook my head, "Better if he doesn't know. Thanks for the coffee."

Buck just shrugged, but didn't say anything as I started towards the door. He went back to whistling as he pushed the mop in between tables.

I found myself on the front porch, frowning in the direction of my house. It was at least a fifteen minute walk home, where I was sure Curly and Tim and Angela would all be laying around nursing hangovers from their various nights. Little did they know I would be joining their complaints of headaches and uneasy stomachs this morning. They all probably thought I was upstairs sleeping.

Damn, I really wish I had a cigarette.

What? I really wish I had a cigarette? I'd never craved a cigarette a day in my life. The smell of tobacco hit me suddenly and I looked around to find a still burning cigarette laying in an ash tray on the railing of the porch. There were still a few hits to it, so I picked it up and finished it off, inhaling slowly as I watched the morning sky turn more and more blue as the moments passed.

Feeling the smoke warm my chest as the smell engulfed me brought on a new wave of memory I wasn't prepared for.

Dallas climbing over top of me as he slipped my shirt over my head. My playful giggle as we rolled to the side to make out.

You don't think we're like together or something now?

The taste of smoke on his lips mixing with the whiskey still fresh on my tongue. That proud smirk he had as I finished off the bottle and wiped my chin.

Good, cause we ain't.

His kiss on my neck. His rough hands running all over my body as I raked my fingers through his hair.

I just want to make sure you ain't going to get all clingy and shit over it. Like, come looking for me trying to ask what you mean to me or something like that. It wasn't anything, it was just some drunk sex, alright?

I puked into the bushes.

I took a deep breath, frowning as I straight myself up. It was just too much to think about at once and so I tried to push the thoughts to the back of my mind. I hurried down the steps, hoping Buck hadn't seen me vomit, and started for home.

I didn't have any reason or right to expect anything of Dallas. Neither of us had made it clear what we wanted from the other and so I couldn't be mad at him, but I still was. Maybe I was more angry at myself for believing he could mean it when he said he liked me. I shook my head quickly. Why did it even matter? Tim and Curly and Angela had random hook ups all the time and I never saw any of them spending the next day sulking over what it had meant. Why couldn't I just have sex with Dallas Winston and move on? Why did it have to mean something? Why did it have to have a closure? Why did it have to have a purpose?

I wanted to be a teenager, I wanted to be alive, but here I was back to my same old worrisome self. And for what? Because Dallas Winston, the toughest hood alive, the boy with no heart, the boy with no girl friends, they boy who gets whatever he wants, might have only wanted me for sex?

Damn Dallas Winston. Damn him.