The Piano Man (Iwaoi)

Chapter 10

        Tooru and Hajime didn't see each other for at least a week after that because everyone else was busy, and as they both knew, meeting alone would have been a bad idea. It would have led to drunkenness even in the absence of wine, touches that were electric and cathartic, nostalgic kisses and regrets because Hajime was engaged, and having sex with the first person he had ever loved would have complicated that immensely. It killed Tooru, but he knew that being alone with Hajime would be too hard, he wouldn't be strong enough to resist it, he would fall into the sheets with him and be happy and not regret a thing—only to later regret it because Hajime regretted it and every emotion Hajime felt was, by extension, an emotion that Tooru felt. So they kept themselves restrained to the text messages and awkward phone calls and silent memories. Tooru lied and told Hajime that he liked Michiko, that he approved, when the truth was that he never could have approved of Hajime loving anyone that wasn't him.

        He kept trying to compose, but after three weeks, he still hadn't decided on major or minor. There were too many options, too many stories he wanted to tell. Some major, some minor. It didn't seem fair to pick one over the other. Maybe he could include a key change. He just wasn't sure.

        It was a strange time to choose, but on Tuesday, Ushiwaka called Tooru. It just so happened that Tooru was in the shower, listening to Chopin, when the call came through, so he didn't hear it. He listened to the voicemail when he got out of the shower and he blushed and giggled when he heard it.

        "Hello, Oikawa. It's Ushijima. I'm sure you knew that already. Anyway, I'm leaving a message because...I think it would have been easier to talk to you rather than the voicemail. It's all right, I'll manage."

        Deep breath.

        "I'm leaving a message because I want to buy you dinner. Wait, I'll be more explicit—I want to take you on a date. But I don't want to pressure you. You can refuse. I hope that you'll let me. You've had an impact on my life and I want to spend some time with you."

        Another deep breath.

        "I'm patient. Take your time. Bye."

        Tooru was both charmed and irritated by his awkwardness. One part of him was intrigued by the way that Ushiwaka couldn't quite say what he wanted, couldn't quite get around to what he needed to say. It was cute and innocent. Another part was so annoyed that he couldn't just get to the point and get over his nervousness to ask Tooru out on this date that he seemed to desperately want. Torn between these parts, Tooru sat, in a towel, on his canopied bed and stared at his phone in indecision. He stared for what seemed like his entire lifetime, trying to decide how he would respond. It wasn't something unusual. With his status, his talents, his looks, how many times had he been asked to dinner? Drinks? Nights in hotel rooms? Somehow this time seemed different. Ushiwaka seemed a bit more earnest, and still some part of him hated that.

        Then he asked himself what there was to lose.

        It wasn't as if he would've been betraying Hajime.

        Hajime had already betrayed him by falling in love with an ambitious and intelligent investigative journalist who looked incredible in red dresses and lipstick.

        (Red was definitely her color.)

        In the end, Tooru decided to accept Ushiwaka's offer.

        He was lonely and slightly horny and he figured it would be a good way to get out of the house without Issei and Takahiro dragging him out by blackmailing him with Top 40 playlists and embarrassing photos. Instead of texting Ushiwaka, he called him back. Half-naked and smiling like a cheeky bastard.