DEH X Reader ONESHOTS

You're the Bomb (Jared x Reader)

Summary: a bet goes wrong, and Jared gets addicted to eating bathbombs, and has to go to the emergency room

Words: 1685

Genre: There's some angst but like it's not that bad

Warnings: cursing??

Requested by @/oreo-fizz      

(A/N: somehow I managed to write this in like three hours and it's the longest Oneshot I've ever done holy crud. I decided to do this one because I've done so many Connor x Readers, and this is my first Jared fic, so enjoy!)
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       There were a lot of things wrong with Jared Kleinman. You were well aware of this, and so was he, along with Evan, and whoever else he associated with.

      All of this aside, he was still your problematic absolute favorite. He had been since kindergarten, when he got put in time out for calling the teacher a shithead. You were neighbors, and both of your parents tried to get you to influence him to be better. In time, you two were best friends, and on occasion partners in crime.

      You just didn't think Jared would be this much of a doof.

      You were very wrong.

      You didn't know that dragging Jared into a Lush at the mall one day would turn into this. You didn't know that daring him to lick a bathbomb would be such a bad thing. How were you supposed to? It was just two days ago...
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      "Jared, come on, don't be a loser. I come into your stores with you!" You begged. He rolled his eyes.

      "You enjoy going to Gamestop, don't you?" Jared asked, smug.  You did, because he'd ramble on about consoles and stats and characters long after you left the mall. It was kinda cute. "Everything in that store smells weird, and makes me wanna barf." He whined

      "Maybe you'll enjoy the Lush store!" You insisted. "Don't knock it until you try it, Kleinman. Pleaseeeeeeeee?" You poked our your bottom lip, fluttering your eyelashes with big doe eyes. He squinted before kicking the floor lightly.

      "Dammit, [name], you know I can't resist that face!" He groaned, and a grin spread across your face. You grabbed his wrist, tugging him in. Various smells instantly filled your nostils, your eyes thoroughly stimulated from the vibrant colors.

      Jared spun around, his senses somewhat overwhelmed by it all.

      "Girls....like this stuff?" He raised an eyebrow, taking a pink and purple bathbomb in his hand. He turned it over in his hand a few times, inspecting it. "What even is this bullshit?" He chuckled, as if he'd just made the joke of the decade or something. You rolled your eyes at Jared's lack of knowledge.

      You took one from the pile into your own hands, holding it up.

      "This is a bathbomb." You giggled. "People put it in the water when the take a bath, and whoosh!" You made a gesture to indicate that it dissolved and spread out.

      That's when the idea popped into your head.

      You swiftly glanced at the employees, who weren't paying any attention to you two. It was the perfect opportunity. "Dude..." you stifled a laugh, lowering your voice. "...lick it. I dare you." Jared's eyes went wide with disbelief.

      "[Name], are you insane?! Not only is that gross and weird, but common courtesy suggests you don't go into a store and begin licking the merchandise!" He whisper-shouted. You raised an eyebrow with a smirk.

      "Since when does Jared Kleinman care about common courtesy?" You countered, and he bit his lip in defeat.
      ".....Fair enough" he shrugged, looking at the colorful orb in his palm. Closing his eyes, Jared slowly brought it up to his mouth, and you couldn't help but laugh as he quickly pressed his tongue to it. It was practically over before it even started.
      "How...how was it?" You raised an eyebrow. You expected a wince or a gag, or some amusing look of disgust, but instead, Jared looked more confused than horrified.