Why We're Here

Going Home

I moved through the crowded aisles. The plane was packed, but that didn't stop Clara from changing seats. She had one all the way in the front, while mine was in the middle. She took the leg room for herself while I was forced to sit next to a screaming child and his mother that ignored him.
It's safe to say that she was thoroughly pissed. I suppose she had every right to be. It's not everyday that your girlfriend breaks into a convent and gets themselves locked in prison in Greece. That's not something to take lightly. It would take more than flowers to make up to her this time.
The bad part is, I'm not sure if we can make up. It's been going on for about a month now, though I tried to ignore it. Getting into fights over little things, conveniently having other places to be. She was growing disinterested in me, and I couldn't blame her. She was an open book, willing to tell me anything and everything, but I was closed off. I couldn't tell her why Bruce vanished every time we had dinner together, I couldn't tell her why Jason had a new bruise every time she saw him. I couldn't even tell her why Barbara had so many computers. I couldn't tell her about my life, and that's what tore us apart.
She wanted no secrets between the two of us, but I had the biggest of all. I couldn't tell her about Batman, Robin, or Blitz. I couldn't tell her about my past life. She knew I was lying to her every time I had to make an excuse, and I think she was getting sick of it.
Of course, I wanted to tell her. More than anything, I wanted to tell her everything. From the death of my parents to how Bruce found me to the real reason why Barbara is in a wheelchair.
I wanted to tell her every little detail, she share my life with her, but I couldn't. Whether that was for my protection or hers, I wasn't sure. I tell myself it was for hers, but part of me knew I was lying.
This accursed secret was ruining my life. I couldn't even keep a girlfriend all because I used to wear a mask. Because I used to protect Gotham, I couldn't have a personal life.
I had thought retiring would put all of that behind me. I didn't go out at night anymore, I haven't even looked at my costume for months. I had hoped the life of Blitz would be behind me, and I could finally move on.
As it turns out, that life never goes away.
The plane flew over Metropolis, the stewardess announced it. Everyone peered out the windows in hopes of glimpsing Superman. Having known him personally, I found no amusement in shoving my face against the window. Luckily, neither did the mother and son sitting next to me. She was too absorbed in ignoring her crying baby.
"Look!" someone shouted, "It's him!"
Everybody crowded on my side of the plane. One girl practically leapt onto my lap. I groaned loudly. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of red and blue. My head instinctively turned where I saw Superman flying parallel to the plane.
Clark glanced at the plane. He waved at a few of the passengers who screamed like they were meeting their favorite rockstar. I simply rolled my eyes.
Clark's eyes scanned the plane, looking in every single window. For a brief moment, I wondered if Bruce told him I was flying home. His eyes found me and he grinned, winking with his eye closest to me. I rolled my eyes, again, and shut the blinds in the window.
I was in no mood to deal with arrogant men in tights. At the moment, all I wanted to do was get home and go to sleep. I wanted to forget this entire exhibition even happened. IT's not like it helped matters, anyways. I was no better off now than I was before. If anything, I was worse, because now I knew there was something to my past that nobody could or would reveal.
And I had a dead twin sister.
How's that for a vacation?
The plane landed in Gotham just a little while later. As soon as the doors opened, Clara was up and gone. I struggled to grab my bag and hurry to catch up with her.
"Clara, wait!" I called, running through the airport.
Clara hardly stalled. I sprinted to walk parallel with her. She refused to even look at me.
"Clara, look, we need to talk."
She hesitated, "Are you ever going to stop lying to me?"
"What?"
"You're hiding things, lying to me, breaking into convents," clara was fuming, "I'm beginning to wonder if your Dad really was the cop and not the criminal."
I sighed, "I know, I'm sorry, but there's some things I just can't tell you."
"Then, there's your answer," Clara stopped to look at me, "I can't be with someone who pretends to be someone else around me."
My eyes widened, "Clara, what are you saying?"
"I'm sorry, Lucille, we both saw this coming," she blinked away tears, "It's over. We're through."
I bit my lip. My first relationship, and it ended just like that. It was all I had to keep from crying.
"If that's what you want, so be it. Goodbye, Clara."
"Goodbye, Lucille."
Without sparing me a passing glance, she hurried away. I stood there for a moment, in the middle of the airport. The people blurred past as tears fell from my eyes. It took me a solid hour before I had the strength to continue.
I expected Alfred to come pick me up, as that's what Bruce said would happen. Instead, Dick was standing there waiting. When he saw me, he grinned, but the grin quickly vanished when he saw me crying.
"Lucy?"
I didn't reply. I simply surged forward and buried my face in his chest. In a brotherly way, he hugged me back. That was the greatest comfort he could offer me.
"What happened?" he asked when I finally pulled away.
I wiped my eyes, "She broke up with me."
"Clara? Why?"
"All the lies and the hiding things, and I broke into a God forsaken convent!" I exclaimed, kicking the air, "I'd break up with me too."
Dick placed a gentle hand on my shoulder, "Hey, it's alright. She just wasn't the right one. You'll find someone, someday, I promise."
"No, I won't! With the live we live, and the lies we have to tell, I'll never find someone to grow old with."
"You will," Dick promised, "You just have to find someone who's crazy aligns with yours. When you find them, they'll love you despite the double life. They'll be the sort of person you trust."
I blinked away tears. I wanted to believe, oh man, I really wanted to believe him. I didn't want to grow old single. Most of all, I didn't want to turn out like Bruce.
"I hope you're right," I mumbled, "I really hope you're right."