Shattered Heart (Discontinued)

Chapter 18

OKAY SO SLIGHT TRIGGER WARNING, NOTHING TOO BAD IN MY OPINION, BUT BE WARNED.

Enjoy 😊

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"You need to go see your grandma"

"But do I really?"

"Yes, now go pack."

"I don't wanna go it's gonna ruin the whole Christmas spirit."

"Nella, we'll be back before Christmas now c'mon your dad wants to leave soon.", I inhale heavily and breathe out a frustrated sigh as I trudge up the stairs.

I never like visiting my grandparents and everyone knows this but somehow, I'm always guilt tripped into going because my dumbass can't say no in fear of being mean. If only for once, things could just go back to the way things were and it wasn't a burden on myself to visit family.

I pace back and forth, grabbing huge chunks of my hair, trying to cope with the thought of seeing that woman again and pretending to be the slightest of happy.

She hates me.

She the reason I can't even think straight.

I can't even remember being that poor image of a happy little "Princess.

My heart rate began to quicken as the thoughts and words that she's said to me come back in full force.

"What do you want to do when you're older?"

"I want to be a cosmetologist.", looking up into my grandmother's eyes I can tell she plainly confused.

"A hairstylist grandma.", answering her question I look up to her with a huge smile on my young face.

"What are you going to do as a hairstylist? Don't you want to be a lawyer or accountant like your grandfather?"

"No, that sounds boring."

"Well, it'll pay well and you'll be making an actual living."

"My hairstylist does my hair and gets plenty of money for one head. I enjoy watching her and learning what she does."

"Well that's not a real job. Don't you have a backup plan?"

"Uhm.. well I like to draw."

"Oh okay and what would you do with that?", then my grandpa walked in before I could answer.

"Drawing? What is drawing going to do? You just gonna be drawing lines and think you get money for it?", he said following in a hearty laugh.

I began to get upset and I could feel my cheeks flaming up in embarrassment, but I can't feel weak in front of them.

"No, I've seen people drawing for cartoons and newspapers even comic strips, it seems fun and I want to be able to create a cartoon like Nickelodeon or Disney.", I said looking up at them both in hopes of a compromise.

"No sweety, you're my princess and I don't want you being some starving artist on the street. That's the only artists I've seen come out of that career. Try doing something more in the real working field."

"Your grandmama's right, you need to find a real career but you still got some more time in your life to become successful just keep thinking on it."

My head begins to hurt as the tears trickle down my face. My hand shoots up to my head in impulse as it begins to hurt as well as my chest where my heart supposedly stands.

You're a failure.

You're a sad excuse for a granddaughter.

You'll never amount to anything.

You've failed dad.

You're failed mom.

Nobody needs a nuisance like you.

They should've disowned you instead of your sister.

I don't even want to be near you but I'm stuck here.

"NO! No, no, no, no, no...", I scream in whispers with my tears out of control and my mind on ends meet to conquer me as I shake my head in a fury to keep it out.

You're the burden that mom, unfortunately, got stuck with.

I fall, knees first, to the floor and huddle myself into a fetal position as I try and muffle my cries in order to not be a disturbance to anyone who may be within ears distance. Rocking back and forth, I cradle myself in a soothing manner, trying to contain the thoughts I've tried keeping in a secret vault.

I slowly drift into quiet sobs with my eyes getting heavier every second. Soon, I stop rocking and lay flat on the ground to take a quick nap before I start packing for this horrible trip to take it's place.

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Okay, I didn't realize how long it's been since I updated.......

But I'm back into focus and these next chapters will seem to blur past as the story is actually coming to an end.

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©2017.

~LoyalK

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.