Stuck in Konoha (Kakashi love story)

Chapter 8- Change of Plans

I woke up before Kakashi, leaving the room and waiting for the team to wake up. I feel so wrong hiding this now... I'm not even sure I'll like to go back to the Akatsuki...

"Summoning Jutsu," I whispered, and soon Takedakeshii, one of my lions appeared.

"Kaori," he greeted sitting down. 

"I'm having trouble," I mutered resting my head in his back.

"What is it?" he asked curiously.

"Well... I was given a mission," i muttered for only him to hear. "but now... I don't think I can complete it..."

"Sigh, you have to be more-"

"I know," I interrupted, knowing he wanted me to explain. "My mission was to go to the leaf village, befriend a sertain man... and kill him."

"The problem being?" he asked.

"I... I actually like that man," I admitted ashamed. "He actually managed to become my... friend."

He stayed silent for a while, taking it all in. After a few minutes, he sighed.

"I think," he said reluctantly. "You shouldn't complete the mission."

I stared at him wide-eyed. That's not like him at all... "R-Really?"

"Kaori... It's been so long since you actually felt something for someone that wasn't hate... I was worried for you. If this man has managed to slip past the wall you built around your heart, then he must be a very special man. Don't let it go for going back to a life you never really enjoyed."

"What about the Akatsuki?" I asked worried. "You're right, I'd rather not go back... but they'd kill me!"

"You underestimate yourself," he replied easily.

"I don't know," I muttered confused. "I can just go and tell them I won't complete the mission-"

"That is a bad idea," he stated.

"You're right..." I muttered. "But... I don't think I want to..."

"What?"

"What if he hurts me?" I asked confused. "Just like the others. What if he just hurts me?"

"You'll have to trust him, and find out on your own," he said as I hugged him close.

"I don't want to risk it again," I admitted sighing.

"That'll make you a coward," he said making me gasp.

"T-I'm no coward!" I reproached. "You've seen me fight the deathliest of opponents! You know I'm no coward!"

"You're a coward when it comes to emotions," he replied sadly. "Give it a chance... people in Konoha might surprie you... not everyone is like your family."

I looked away defeated. "What will I say the Akatsuki not to get killed."

"Well, you could tell them you're working on it for now... but I think you should think of what to say to the leaf ninja," he replied thinking. "And especially that man."

I gasped. "They'll hate me once they find out!" I realized. "They'd kill me themselves!"

"Maybe," he agreed, not helping at all. "Or maybe they won't."

"Yeah right," I rolled my eyes. "They'd have every reason too... I'd understand... yet... I don't want to leave... better be killed by them than Akatsuki huh? At least I will deserve my death."

"As I said," he said smiling warmly. "You'll have to find out. Although, there is this frase I've heard... how was it... Ah, yeas; 'Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all',"