For maybe fifteen minutes, I simply paced. I allowed myself to worry about what exactly had gone wrong. Had someone gotten hurt? Was there a huge change in the movement? Did someone mess things up?
When I finally accepted that worrying would help absolutely nothing, I sat back down on the couch and continued reading poetry.
I got through five incredibly thought provoking poems before the door opened and Zane and Finn came in.
Taking in their appearances, I noticed a number of things such as Zane’s arm slung around Finn’s shoulders, Finn’s red eyes and stray tears, both of their gazes on me held pity.
But the most important detail was blatantly obvious.
“Where is River?” I asked, struggling to put all the pieces of the puzzle I was seeing together.
Finn cringed. “There was an incident…” he bit his lip, hard. “I’m sorry, Blue… she’s gone.”
But I didn’t believe him, I simply couldn’t. He had to be lying. They were playing some sick prank on me and River was just waiting outside of the door to try and get a big reaction out of me.
I wasn’t going to fall for it; I just was not that gullible.
So, I went around the guys towards the door but Zane grabbed my wrist, forcing me to stop.
“Where are you going?” he asked, quietly.
“To go get River.” I replied easily.
“Blue…”
“She’s right outside.” I insisted.
“No, honey, she isn’t.” he sighed.
“Just let me check, I can guarantee that I will come back with her.” I persisted, trying to break out of his strong grasp.
He turned me around to face him, his turquoise eyes burned into mine, begging me for something. “She is gone.”
“No,” I shook my head quickly as the pieces started coming together. Zane had been supporting a crying Finn… “You are wrong. You are lying!”
“I wish he was.” Finn spoke, his voice was broken.
And then I begun to thrash against Zane’s hold, refusing to accept it and believe them. She was right outside, she had to be!
Finn grabbed my other side and I tried to fight off him and Zane. I kicked out, throwing punches if I could.
“This is some type of sick fucking prank, isn’t it?” I yelled.
They tried pinning my arms to my sides before Finn eventually snapped at me.
“Why would we joke about something like this?!” he yelled in my face. “Accept it, Bluebell. She died. River is fucking dead!”
I sunk to the ground, shaking my head frantically and feelings my eyes prick with tears. There was a huge ache throughout my body which consumed most of my heart. I could hardly breathe with this suffocating sensation in my lungs.
It felt as if I was actually going to die, right here, right now.
She was my everything, and now she was fucking gone. What was I supposed to do? I felt like I couldn’t look to the future because there really was no future without her; I did not want there to be one.
She made me stronger, more daring and much more passionate. She had opened my eyes to this other world she had left me in.
River had promised to come back to me, and that she wouldn’t run away, but she had let me down.
