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Chapter 36: Misery

[Billie's POV]

I stare down at the lake with black tears running down my face. This is officially the worst birthday ever. I thought that I was finally going to sit back and enjoy it with my beautiful wife and friends. Well...my so-called friends. Now, I don't even know who they are anymore. Why did I rush into this? Maybe if I had waited on Alex things would've been different. That's not possible since I know I wouldn't be able to sit by and watch her get hurt again. All I've wanted to do was help her. I thought that, with a bit of guidance, she could be happy again. Yes, she's smiles and laughs and has fun, but I can see straight through that. Maybe they can't, but I can. I can see it in her eyes that deep inside she wants to cry, because she's scared. She puts on a brave front, and had me fooled for a little while. Eventually, I caught on. I just want to help her out of this...depression that she's in. How can I when people are constantly trying to tear us apart? My whole train of thought crashes as another reflection appears next to mine. Mike's sea blue eyes stare down into the water. I can't bear to even look at him anymore. No, I'm not angry, just hurt. The anger was gone a long time ago. Now, there's just this hollow feeling in my heart called hurt.

Billie: How did you find me?

Mike: I knew you would come here. We used to always come hang here as kids. You said that this is where you felt the safest and inspiration always flowed. If you weren't here, I don't know where I would've looked.

Billie: I guess I'll have to find somewhere else.

Mike: Please don't. I'll leave, you stay. You found this place to begin with anyway.

He turns to walk away. Something is urging me to stop him. Why? All he's done is tried to break me. Is that the point? To show him that I may be bruised, but never broken? One could only hope. I swing my legs over the edge of the bridge so that I'm sitting on the edge. My feet don't even reach the water. The perks of being short are many.

Billie: Mike....wait.

He stops, but doesn't turn around to meet my eyes. I hesitate to say more. What if I screw up and cause even more drama? Tre seemed to be on the breaking point and I'm sure Alex is blaming this on herself. I need to get her out of that habit. Maybe I can make this right, though. You see, I'm the type of person who hates conflict in a family. I know Mike isn't technically my brother, but he's been there. Did he hurt me? Yes. Will I cut him off, though? No, never. The real question is: can I trust him again? That's a hard one. Once you lose my trust, it's going to be hard to gain it back. Mike isn't that awful. He's a bit misguided, but that's it. Even though they say "people don't change, time does", I know that the old Mike is in there somewhere. It's just going to take a lot to get him back out. I'm not going to give up as along as he's not.

Mike: I'm sorry, Billie.

Billie: Mike...

Mike: No, I have to tell you this. I know I haven't been a good listener or friend. You have. That's why I need to open up and tell you this.

Billie: What?

Mike: My mom just died.

I choke on my words. No, that's not true. His mother was like mine. She was the nicest lady I knew. How could she just be gone like that? I feel my eyes swell up with tears.

Billie: H-how?

Mike: You remember when Anastacia came home that day, right?

Billie: Yeah, what about it?

Mike: A few hours before, I got a phone call from the hospital. It was her. She told me about her cancer and begged me to stay strong.

Cancer? My dad comes to mind. He died from cancer too. It feels like my heart is about to shatter. I turn around to look at Mike. He's on his knees, staring at the water opposite to me. I hesitate to sit next to him.