It All Started In Rehab ✓

[Chapter Twenty-Two] Lashing Out

Chapter Twenty-Two- Lashing Out
Bailey's Pov

The next night I went to Julian's room he wasn't doing so well, I tried to cheer him up but it wasn't working. He barley even looked at me and he just laid in bed

I sat on the side he was facing and ran my hands through his hair, I didn't ask him questions because he didn't want to talk about it he would tell me when he was ready

"Can I get you anything?" I asked him and he shook his head.

"Can you go, please?" he asked and my hand immediately stopped moving.

"What?" I asked softly.

"Just go Bailey, I want to be alone. Sleep in your room tonight." He rolled the other way and I just kind of sat there. He was so much better with all of this than I was.

When I told him to go away he never did, I can count on one hand the amount of days we slept apart. He always pushed me and seemed to know what I needed even when I didn't so him telling me to leave had me torn.

Did I say no and curl up with him because I know he's struggling and needed someone or do I respect his space and leave him alone tonight? If I stay he may get mad but if I leave when it's not really what he really wants me to do would he be upset or hurt?

"Please look at me." I said and he shook his head and remained the other way.

"Get out." He told me and I know he was struggling but those words and his tone made my chest constrict a little painfully.

He was better at taking the verbal assault, I wasn't. I took everything personally and so I felt more confused now. It was like day to night difference with him from yesterday to today.

"Julian, look at me." I don't know how I should approach this.

"Get our Bailey, this is my fucking room!" he raised his voice but still wouldn't look at me

"Oh, does this feel familiar? How many times did I tell you to get out of mine and to leave me alone? How many times did you stay when I told you not to?" I asked suddenly annoyed with this whole situation.

"It's different!" he told me

"No it's really not. It's the same because you pushed me and wouldn't leave me alone but now I'm expected to do every fucking thing you say?" I asked and he finally turned to face me, pissed off. well buddy, I'm pissed too! I'm not backing down.

"You are the most annoying fucking person I've ever met" he growled out and I just raised an eye brow.

"No I'm not. Lacey is." He was attacking now and I knew that I would probably leave here with my feelings hurt but I just wanted to see some fire in him, he couldn't mope around forever. I needed to know he was in there somewhere.

"Can't you ever just do what you're told?" he asked me

"No. I have a problem with authority." I didn't like being told what to do.

"Of course you do." he mumbled

"Please, you break almost every fucking rule." He shrugged

"Yeah, and now I'm following one. Get the fuck out of my room." He stood up and pulled me out of his bed which resulted in me falling not so gracefully on my ass, which hurt.

"Fucking dick. What's with the man handling!" I yelled. I hated when people did this to me.

I was short and so everyone always fucking messed with me and it pissed me off. it made me even more angry because he was over a foot taller and his arm muscles were probably bigger than my thighs, and he nearly doubled my weight.

I thought he was only like sixty more but nope, I didn't realize how much muscle could weigh.

"I told you to get out."

"Yeah and I told you to look at me but you wouldn't do that either." I crossed my arms from the ground and he sighed and reached down for me so I swatted his hands away

"If you fucking pick me up I'm going to hit you." I warned.

"Fuck Bailey, I'm trying to help." He told me and I rolled my eyes

"Save it, you're the reason I'm on the ground. Stop fucking man handling me!" I snapped and he ran his hands through his hair in annoyance. I pushed myself off the ground and stood up to him. I tried to look intimidating but unfortunately that never worked for me.

How the fuck was I so short and my brother was six foot one? How does that even work! We're twins for crying out loud. My brother was nearly a foot taller and Julian was taller than that.  

"What is your problem?" he asked

"You, you're my problem!" I yelled. We were now progressing to yelling.

"Yeah, well you're a fucking pain in my ass."

"I never asked you to help me or even try! You were the one who was persistent and wouldn't go away."

"Fine, I'm gone then. Don't come back!" He yelled and that hurt.

"Is that what you want?" I asked him my voice suddenly dropping to a near whisper

"I can't be sitting there fucking worrying about poor little Bailey all the time. I've done everything I could for you and you're an ungrateful bitch. You don't care what I'm going through all you care about is yourself."

That felt like a slap to the face right there. I knew he was in a bad mood but that was uncalled for.

"Right, that's all I care about. I'm sorry I'm not a fucking whore who will screw you and take all your fucking problems away." I snapped. i don't deal with sex well and i won't be used for it.

"Please, if I wanted you I would have had you." he said and my jaw literally dropped because I cannot believe he said that.

I guess the last month did mean absolutely nothing to him.

I felt the tears and I lowered my harden gaze and stepped around him. I was done.

I walked to the door and I heard him mumbling behind me. As soon as I opened the door it shut

"Let me go." I said as I tried opening the door again.

"Fuck, Bailey I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He told me

"We're not children, Sorry doesn't take it back and sorry doesn't change that I now know exactly how you feel about me." I wouldn't look at him now.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it." he tried again

"Yeah well I'm just a selfish bitch that you don't want, because if you did you would have already fucked me by now." I ripped the door open and walked out of his room

"Bailey please." he said and I heard his voice break but I did nothing but walk away.

"Next time jut hit me, a physical blow would hurt less." i said but didn't turn around as i walked back to me room. All I tried to do was help him. I just wanted him to look at me so I couldn't know he was okay, if he really just wanted some time I would have left; I just wanted to make sure it was what he wanted.

And now I was leaving like this.

I would not be some fucking whore to him that he can screw for his pleasure, that just wasn't who I was and I will not be that person for him. I refused to be used.

Twenty Today! :)
Goodbye Teens..