You're My Dad?

Caught.

The weekend passed by fast, conversations with Jessie and hanging out with Shane and Joey really pass time.

Jessie and I haven’t talked about him liking me ever since he said it. I guess he was just joking with me.

I woke up to the sound of my alarm and got scared; not hearing that thing for two days really wakes you up in a startle. 

I was dressed and got ready for school. I did my makeup and my hair. I grabbed all my supplies and Shane drove me to school. He was being quiet lately. He hasn’t been talking to Joey or me. I’m starting to get scared about him. He might be getting worse.

He didn’t talk the entire car ride except when we got to school and he told my to have a good day and kissed my cheek. He was caring. I wish he would just tell me what’s wrong, but what it sounds like, he won’t tell anybody.

I wouldn’t blame him. He is going through a rough time right now.

Yuki is getting to know her surroundings in the house and she knows where to go if I call her. I set up a little bed by mine. She is so cute.

I enter the school buildings and was greeted by many people. They all said hello. I went to my locker and got my things. Jessie was standing behind me waiting so I walked him to our first class. He had to stand in front of the class and say his name, where he came from, and how old he was. 

It was funny watching him try not to laugh ad he answer all those questions. He sat down next to me once he was done talking and there were a bunch of “Ohhh” s from the other students. I find it funny because I do like Jessie and he likes me. I think he is just taking this a little too fast. We just met two days ago. However, I did get to know a lot more about him. It was nice knowing him. 

The teacher began instructing us and said we have a paper due on Friday. We had to write about where we think we would be in 10 years. This one was easy for me. I have always thought about this. I honestly want to be an actor. It seems like a fun job. I don’t want to do it for the fame; I want to do it to help people. I want to relate to people and help them make it through what I went through.

We started making thinking maps to help us and I wrote down a few ideas. 

We went to our next class and we just sat and were lectured all day.

The end of the day came quickly and I couldn’t find Jessie. I ran into someone while looking around. He stood up, apologized, and then walked off. I had to pick up all my papers, which were scattered from one all to the other. 

It took almost 20 minutes until I cleaned it all up. I then opened my locker and got my backpack. I walked outside where I saw Jessie sitting on the curb. He wasn’t doing anything but just sitting there with his head in his hands. 

I walked up to him and sat down.

Me: What’s wrong? Why aren’t you home?

Jessie: I don’t want to go home. I am abused there. 

Me: I’m so sorry. I know the feeling.

I gave him a hug. I do know the feeling. I use to be abused every day by my mother.

Jessie: You are abused.

Me: I use to be abused. However, I still remember how much it hurt, both mentally and physically. I’m sorry. I now it sucks.

Jessie: Its fine…

We sat there in silence for a few minutes, it wasn’t awkward though. We just sat there enjoying each other’s company.

Me: Come home with me.

Jessie: What?

Me: Come home with me. You can spend the night and go back to school tomorrow.

Jessie: I don’t have cloths.

Me: Borrow Shane and Joeys! You’re about as tall as they are!

Jessie’s face lit up. He looked happy as if I have given him a new dog.

Jessie: All right!

We walked up the street and I was surprised to see Joey and Shane were still there. They were however making out. We both started laughing and knocked on the window.

Joey slid back to the passenger seat as if nothing has happened.

Me: Hey guys. This is Jessie. I was wondering if he could stay over and possibly borrow some cloths.

Joey: Sure. But why?

Me: He is… abused… and I felt bad because I know the feeling.

Shane: Same here…

We both hopped into the car and drove home. Yuki welcomed us.

Yuki started sniffing Jessie then barked at him. It was a mad bark. This was the first time I have heard Yuki bark like that.

We walked up to my room and sat on my bed. I didn’t know what to do. 

We talked for a few hours then we got called down for dinner.

We had chicken and rice.

We ate then Jessie made his bed on the couch. We didn’t know what to do so Jessie just fell asleep and I went up to my room. 

I wonder what Jessie thinks of me. I wonder if we could ever date. I wonder if he is only using me. Probably because you are useless Hannah. Nobody likes you. You are just a waist of space.

I thought in my head.

The voices are right. I don’t have any friends. 

I pulled out the knife that I had under my bed and cut myself. Five cuts on each arm. I was going to do more until Shane walked in. he looked towards my bed expecting me to be there but then found me on the floor. He couldn’t see my wrists.

Shane: I’m coming to say goodnight.

Shane walked around the bed to hug me but gasped at my cut, bloody arms. 

He walked to the door and closed it then came back over to me. He dragged me into the bathroom lightly and washed my cuts.

Shane: Hannah why would you do this?

I just looked at the floor not wanting to tell him how fucked up I am.

Shane: Hannah!

I looked up at him. He had tears in his eyes.

Shane: Don’t make the same mistakes I have. I still regret it. 

Shane pulled up his sleeves revealing multiple scars. Some big some small. Shane just gave me a hug.

Shane: Promise me you wont do this again Hannah…

Me: I… I promise…

Shane gave me another hug then walked out of the room.

I fell asleep not too long after.