Begin Again

Chapter XIX. Lost

Listen to Saturn by Sleeping At Last when it's Harry's Pov. You won't regret it. Or you could play it throughout the whole chapter. Or not 😂❤✌
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"Why are you here?" He asked stiffly, not moving his arms.

I pull away and angrily slap his chest. "What do you mean why I'm here? What if I wasn't here? What were you doing?" I push him back with both my fists. "You scared the shit out of me, why would you do something like that to yourself?" I furiously wipe away the tears.

His eyes were cold, his brows furrowed and lips pursed. Does he not care he almost died? What the hell?

"Why do you care?"

I felt the question cut through my chest, almost like a force pushing me back- like a blow on my face. "Why do I care?" I whisper, wiping away another set of tears that fell. I just can't seem to stop crying because of this man.

He stood still as he stares at me, waiting for an answer. Why do I care?Because he's my friend. You don't just let your friends take their own lives in vain.

You can feel the wrong in that answer. Don't lie to yourself.

I swallow, looking down at my bare feet. I bring my hand over my chest, mentally telling myself to calm down. "You hurt yourself, you hurt me." I look at him, all my anger vanishing into the air as I just felt sadness fill me, every single inch of my body. "If you found me the same way I found you, lifeless, under the water, how would you feel?" I wipe away my tears one last time as I stared at his hard expression.

Each moment of silence that passes, a crack appears in my heart. As if it hadn't been shattered just sometime ago.

I notice his hands turning into fists at his sides. I flinch back when they come my way but I gasp when he wraps his arms around me tightly. I respond right away and hold him just as tight, taking a deep breath. 

I feel him start shaking lightly, and the wetness of his tears on the skin of my neck. "I'm sorry," his voice cracks.

"It's okay, let it all out." I rub his back softly as he quietly cried. I bit down my lips to stop myself from crying again too, I can't bare having him suffer like this. I just...I don't understand, why did he do something to himself? Did someone tell him something? Did someone he cares about die? What?

What if he died?

What if he died?

What if he died?

I shake my head and rest my head on his chest. He's alive. He's okay. Nothing bad happened.

I hear the creaking sound of a door opening, and I open my eyes, reluctantly pulling away from Harry. We both turn to look at the front door. Turns out it's Martha, with Josh behind her.

"Jesus, Tay you could have answered your phone." She groans. "What happened? Are you okay?" She looks at Harry.

I look at him, finding him wiping at his eyes with his face flushed. I place my hand at the small of his back and trace my thumb on him lightly.

"Yeah," he replies in a shaky voice. "I'm fine."

I look back at Martha, who's not convinced at all but she looks at me with a raised brow. Later I mouth to her and she nods, turning to Josh and taking his hand. "If you guys need anything just give me a call," she said. "I mean it," she adds before leaving and closing the door.

I sigh and turn to Harry, finding his gaze to the floor and his bottom lip over his upper one in a pout. For some reason I get the feeling that he's ashamed or embarrassed.