5 years ago
at the lowest I'd ever been
starving myself
depressed
anxious and worried;
people think we make these stories up
for pity, and for attention
what they don't know is
how much we wish it was fake
oh how fabulous it'd be if social anxiety was a millennial trend
how sweet it'd be is depression was seasonal
how damn amazing it'd be if anorexia was in;
I never thought I'd taste happiness again
Nor true laughter
But I did.
Until one month ago
when my world shockingly tore apart
When I surprisingly couldn't sleep at night
Tormented and suddenly alone
Pulling myself together for her
Screaming inside because I couldn't moan in pain
Crying myself to sleep because I couldn't show emotion during the day
Feeling as if god had ripped half of my heart out and left a cavity, a void.
Then I lay here today
And go full circle again
I wipe my tears
I push the trauma down
I blink a little faster
In hopes that I don't spiral down to where I was 5 years ago
Fearing death.
YOU ARE READING
A Collection of Poems (Publishing)
PoetryExplore my entrance from adolescence into adulthood as I experience internal struggles such as depression and social anxiety, as well as awkward situations and first loves. It's gonna be shit show.
