Let's Be Alone Together

Chapter 23

With the whole situation with Danielle brought to an end, Liam feels much lighter. The weather is improving too, and with it, his mood. Although he still wishes that he could have found Zayn, he doesn't let it drag him down anymore, figuring that if their paths are meant to cross a second time they will. The best thing he can do is whatever's right for himself. Be independent and responsible and work towards the future that he wants. With Louis and Niall as his loyal cheerleaders he's determined to continue on the path towards self discovery that he started on with Zayn. He thinks there's something poetic in that, something comforting, knowing that no matter what, Zayn left a permanent impression on his life.

He's still hoping he'll meet him again someday though. The way he feels for him doesn't fade with the increasing number of days that separate his time with Zayn from where he is now. He still dreams about him from time to time. Sometimes it's something as simple as being on the beach with him again, hearing his voice, smelling cigarettes and salt. Except they're holding hands, which is what makes it clear that it's a dream and not a memory. One morning Liam wakes up and he can so vividly recall the way Zayn's thumb had brushed over his knuckles that he wouldn't be surprised to find some sort of remnant on his skin.

Other times his dreams are less realistic. It'll start off with something from his memories, and then just turn into something so weird he'd almost start questioning his sanity. He remembers one where he's with Zayn in Paris and the next scene he's in Australia and Zayn is, for some odd reason, a kangaroo, who carries his sketchbooks in his pouch. Just as Liam's about to ask him how he can even hold a pencil with those tiny arms, the scene changes again and they're in a waterpark, Zayn's arms around him, begging him not to let go because he can't swim. He's wearing floaties but he's laughing, obviously playing up his fear to stay close to him. Not that Liam minds. He's got his arms around him, fingers warm on his waist, and then, bam, they're in Vegas, in gorgeous suits in a chapel except they're not getting married, rather, Liam is the minister, marrying Zayn off to some gorgeous long haired model.

Every morning, without fail, there's this brief moment of sadness, darkness tangling around his heart and squeezing. But every morning Liam reminds himself that at least he gets to dream about him, and that if that's the trade off, he'd much rather dream about Zayn - even when he sometimes loses him in his dreams - than never meet him again, even if he never sees him when he's awake.

With June turning into July, Louis takes a week and a half off from work. Liam had recently sold his car to make his half of the rent, so they're taking Louis' car to go up to their families. The plan is for Liam to drop Louis off in Doncaster before making the trip down to Wolverhampton for a few days. Afterwards, Louis plans to take a train down to Wolverhampton, so the two of them can take a short vacation. They haven't really planned anything beyond that, which isn't Liam's usual style at all, but after telling Louis all about his impromptu trip to Europe, he really has no excuse not to just get in a car and see where the road would take them. At least this time they don't need passports and dictionaries to make any plans.

Even with a limited budget (Liam still hasn't got a job, and he doesn't feel very comfortable spending his parents' money, or Louis' for that matter) it promises to be a fun trip, and as Louis had told him when he protested his friend spending money on him, he hadn't had a holiday in forever, and Liam's only choice was when they were going, not if or where. Liam really is so lucky to have mates like this.

It's nice, being on the road, driving again, even if Louis falls asleep in the car before they've even made it out of London. Liam doesn't mind all that much though. It's early, the sun's barely up, and with music playing quietly through the car's speakers and Louis' soft snoring accompanying him, he's content to be behind the wheel. They stop for lunch along the way, Louis charming the waitresses at the diner into an extra slice of pie, and Liam, for the first time, just feels absolutely content.