Pretty Little Gangster

Chapter 32

           

Thought we could always try a little bit harder but if the dice don't wanna roll in your favor it falls apart

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"Is your dad meeting us at the airport?" Faye questioned as she takes a seat next to me on the private plane Sin provided us with. He was in the back skyping with someone from his gang regarding drug shipments I guess.

"He was but he found out he had a meeting so..." I trail off not wanting to think about it too much. I hadn't even arrived yet but my dad had still found some way to blow me off. I wasn't all that upset about it, though to be honest I wasn't surprised. When you have no expectations you don't get too disappointed.

"I'm sorry Mari." Faye places a hand on my arm and offers me a sad smile. She knows all too well the blatant disregard my father has towards me, she still tried to convince me that he cared and that there was hope for us but I gave up on that a long time ago. I had to admit though a part of me hoped that this revelation about Tatiana would somehow bring us closer together. I guess that 'no expectations' mentality flew right out the window.

"I'm okay, it's nothing new." I plaster an uncaring look on my face to try and show her that I'm okay but I can tell she sees right through it-luckily she chooses not to say anything else on the matter.

After wallowing in self pity I finally decide to stop being such a little bitch and try to at least act like I'm happy to be back in New Orleans. Positive thinking and all that crap right?

After our plane lands and we arrive at our hotel I make my way to my room for a moment of privacy. I talked to my mom, Sophia about coming to visit dad and to say she wasn't happy was an understatement. I get where she's coming from but this was just something I needed to do. She wanted nothing to do with him and I think she might be a little worried about his reaction to the fact that she was the one that spilled the beans about Tatiana.

"Hey we just arrived." I greeted Sophia as she answered the phone with a reluctant 'hello'.

"I hope you get what you're looking for." She sighs sadly as she accepts the fact that I need to do this for myself.

"Thank you." I smile even though she can't see me. "It means a lot to me."

"I know honey, just...be careful okay?" I can almost imagine her squeezing her eyes shut in that way she does when she gets worried. "I don't want you to get hurt."

"I'm not going in there hoping for a big, happy family reunion Sophia." I roll my eyes, "This is purely for information, I'm not expecting her to want me or for him to act like he cares."

"Sweetie, he's your father he absolutely adores you. He might not be able to show..." she starts but I cut her off.

"I know you're trying to make me feel better but I'm really okay." I chuckle lightly. I appreciated Sophia's attempts but I knew the truth and I had accepted it a long time ago. "Just stay safe until I get back."

"Okay sweetie, I love you." She states.

"I...I'll see you when I get back." I mumble before hanging up the phone. I knew what a colossal jerk I was being but I still had a little reluctance towards Sophia after everything we've been through. We were in a good place but we still had a long way to go.

Before I could fall deeper into this massive hole I'd dug myself into I shook the thoughts from my head and dialed a number I hadn't dialed in a long time. The phone rang for a less than 3 rings before the old familiar voice greeted me warmly.

"Marilyn Rhodes, it's been forever!" Clarissa greeted me from the other end. Clarissa Danes-my former bully and tormenter, she had been front and centre for almost every single put-down, teasing and or name-calling from the start. She had recently gotten in contact with me via Facebook and messaged me saying how completely sorry she was and how I didn't deserve any of that. I was skeptical and angry at first when I realized who she was but after a while of dodging her apologies I finally came to the conclusion that I had to move on and that what she was doing was actually really noble. Not a lot of people could own up to the fact that they had been in the wrong, me included so I really appreciated her efforts. Even though she was a big part of why I hadn't stepped foot in New Orleans for 3 years I still couldn't face everyone else so I shut that part of myself down. But I was finally ready to completely let it go.