Collective Mumbles (JhoBea oneshots)

Disguise

"Hoy, De Leon! Hanggang kailan ka pa ba magiging matigas ah?"

Sermon nang sermon. Araw-araw nalang.

"Hanggang dumating yung tamang panahon o tamang tao. Which is, 'di mangyayari."

Bumuntong hininga siya.

"Wala na ba yung Bea na nakilala ko?" Malungkot na saad niya.

Humarap ako sa kanya at tiningnan siya. "Ito parin siya. I'm still the same. But I guess, my heart has changed."

Tuluyan na 'kong umalis sa bahay namin. Wala na akong oras para makinig pa sa mga sermon niyang paulit-ulit.

Hinding-hindi na ako magbabago. Dahil hinding-hindi narin naman siya babalik.

Hinampas ko ang steering wheel. "Ba't niyo ba kasi kami iniwan, Pa?"

Never na 'kong naniwala sa mga true love na 'yan. 'Di naman yan totoo. Kita mo nga, sarili kong tatay, iniwan kami. How cruel is he, diba?

"Love's stupid." I said to myself while driving.

'Di ko alam kung saan ako pupunta. 'Di ko rin alam kung ba't ako nagdadrive ngayon.

Dito nalang ako tatambay. Sa Moro Field, ng Ateneo.

I'm an alumni here. I often spend my days just adoring how beautiful Ateneo is.

"How I wish alot of my days were as beautiful as you.." I whispered as I feel the breeze of the wind.

I closed my eyes and let the serenity goes within me.

"But, I'm tired wishing.." I opened my eyes and smiled sadly to myself. Well, kanino pa ba? Ako lang naman mag-isa.

I'm planning to kill myself today.

I don't want the pain to stay longer with me. I just want my peace. And I know, this is the only way I would get rid of it.

"Just take me.." I laid on grass. I closed my eyes, again. Wala na 'kong gustong gawin pa. Gusto ko nang kunin ako, para matapos na 'tong lahat.

I stayed in that position for a good 15 minutes. I'm still alive, though.

I sighed in defeat. I stood up and fixed myself. When I got satisfied, I started walking away.

So where to go now? I have no one to go to, nor a place to go to. Just this.. Ateneo. The one place I truly called home. It's my comfort zone.

"I just want to die." I screamed so loud, my lungs hurt. No one will hear me here.

"Just take me! My life is useless!" I screamed louder while looking at the sky. My eyes and soul were begging to be heard.

"No, you're not useless." Someone spoke from my back.

I quickly looked at my back. I saw a lady. She has this round eyes, average height, has a sunflower on her hand, and wears a yellow bag. Who the hell on earth will wear a yellow bag for college?