Best Quotes EVER!

5. Gaius

Gaius: It's all ridiculous. I didn't save Uther. You did.

Merlin: No, no. For once, I'm happy for someone else to take the credit. You were prepared to sacrifice your life to save me.

Gaius: Where do you get that from?

Merlin: I thought...

Gaius: No. I didn't do anything. You saved me and you saved Uther. Maybe you are a genius.

Merlin: You think so?

Gaius: Well, almost. One day.

Gaius: Has anyone ever told you you're a genius?

Merlin: You certainly haven't.

Gaius: You've got the food I prepared for you?

Merlin: Yes.

Gaius: Careful with the wine. You know what you're like. One whiff of a barmaid's apron and you're singing like a sailor.

Merlin: Where did you get the water to make the tea? *takes a sip*

Gaius: Fortunately for the both of us you forgot to empty your bath yesterday.

Merlin: *spits it back out* You're making tea from my bath water?

Gaius: It's not so bad. Perhaps a little bit...soapy.

Merlin: (cleaning Gaius's leech tank) This is horrible. This is truly digusting.

Gaius: Than maybe next time you'll think twice about lying to me. You have something on your face(Merlin puts his hand to his face and discovers several leeches)

 

(Gaius, Sir Leon and a number of Knights have called a meeting to tell Uther about Queen Catrina)

Uther: I didn't know we were due a court meeting.

Gaius: Well, we just wanted to make sure you knew, just in case it passed you by. You do know, your wife is a troll, sire?

Uther: What?

Gaius: Well, what with the warts and the-

Sir Leon: The smell.

Gaius: The smell. She also appears to have a set of fangs.

Sir Leon: I wouldn't call them fangs. More like tusks.

Gaius: Yes, they are more like tusks. Not that that's necessarily a bad thing. We just thought you should know.(Gaius and Sir Leon smile)

Uther: The next person to insult Queen Catrina, will be charged with treason and executed.(Gaius and Sir Leon's smiles fade)

Merlin: Arthur's thanking me, Uther's grateful, you're proud... I've never been this popular!

Gaius: I'm almost certain it won't last.

Merlin: Just let me enjoy the moment.

Merlin: I may have caused a problem. Although, it wasn't entirely my doing.

Gaius: What now Merlin.

Merlin: Arthur's in love.

Gaius: And how did you cause that?

Merlin: That bit isn't my fault, the other bit is.

Merlin: Did you go out last night?

Gaius: Yes, I had to get some herbs.

Merlin: Herbs...?

Gaius: A... A new supplier just arrived.

Merlin: Right... Do your suppliers normally kiss you?

Gaius: You followed me. How dare you!