Best Quotes EVER!

4. Castiel

Dean: We're here why?

Castiel: A deputy sheriff laid eyes on the archangel.

Dean: And he still has eyes? All right, what's the plan?

Castiel: [shrugs] We'll... tell the officer that he witnessed an Angel of the Lord, and the officer will tell us where the angel is.

Dean: You're serious? You're gonna walk in there and tell him the truth?

Castiel: [confused] Why not?

[Dean slips an FBI badge into Castiel's inside pocket, fusses with his shirt and tie]

Dean: Because... we're humans. And when humans want something, really really bad... we lie.

Castiel: [puzzled] Why?

Dean: Because... that's how you become president.

Dean: [after the courtesan has run off angrily] What the hell did you do?

Castiel: I don't know. I just looked at her in the eyes and told her it wasn't her fault that her father Gene ran off. It was because he hated his job at the post office.

Dean: [slightly amused] Oh no, *man*.

Dean: Okay, so we trap him in a steel cage of holy fire, but, uh, one question: how the hell do we get him here?

Castiel: There's... well, almost an open phone line between a vessel and his angel. One just has to know how to dial.

[leans over and mutters some strange words in the vessel's ear]

Castiel: I'm here, Raphael. Come and get me, you little b*stard.

Castiel: Even without your brother.

Dean: [bitterly] Especially without my brother.

[Castiel looks at him]

Dean: I mean I spent so much time worrying about the sonofab*tch... I mean, I've had more fun with you in the past twenty-four hours than I've had with Sam in years. And you're not that much fun. Funny, you know, I've been so chained by my family, but now that I'm alone... hell, I'm happy.

[smiles, looks over; Castiel is gone]

[Castiel appears behind Dean; Dean sees him in the mirror and jumps]

Dean: God! Don't do that!

Castiel: Hello Dean.

[Dean turns around; Castiel stares at him from only inches away]

Dean: Cas, we've talked about this. Personal space?

Castiel: My apologies.

[he backs away]

Castiel: [to Dean] Let's go.

[he turns, starts walking away]

Rapheal: Castiel!

[Cas turns back]

Rapheal: I'm warning you. Do not leave me here. I *will* find you.

Castiel: Maybe one day. But today you're *my* little b*tch.

[he exits]

Dean: [following Cas] What he said!